QUOTE: What am I getting at?
Thanks to this site I have developed a great sense of self and a much higher level of confidence (not perfect by any means, but a hell of a lot improved). I've committed myself for the last couple years to doing whatever it takes to get what I want (money, girls, power etc). All of a sudden this does not seem appealing to me. I feel willing to give up all the hard work to follow a completely different path. All of a sudden, the thought of screwing people over or "succeeding at all costs" makes me really uneasy.
Power games with girls/coworkers are something I used to be able to play very well, but now I want nothing to do with them.. I feel like everything I wanted in life is being turned on its head. Maybe I'm just ranting here, but the world has really been showing its dark side lately, and I just don't want a part of all the bull****. Is there anyone out there who honestly gives a ****?
Where to go from here??? All the DJ techniques I've read over and over seem so insignificant. God, I had everything planned out, I feel like I'm back at square one and then some. I've got no idea what I want out of life again... anyone have any input? or have I gone completely wacko-jacko?
These are the times that try men's souls. Our ancestors and forefathers always had clear and solid definitions of masculinity and manhood. While the definitions varied in detail, the context was the same. Today, there is no system, no genuine respect for manhood. If a woman committed suicide, it would be a 'tragedy'. But if a young man commits suicide? Ho-hum, just another 'statistic'.
You're not crazy. You've grown up. Most people never do.
Children are remarkably selfish. This is fine, as they are children. Growth is seen as the child growing and expanding on his/her abilities or schoolwork.
However, around the age of sixteen (especially for girls), they become enchanted with a self-image for themselves. This self-image varies from individual to individual, but the results are the same: to create envy from others, excess pride, material goods, and sexual goods.
Nature, herself, has written a code onto our hearts and natures. We each have our talents and gifts. And who can decide what they dream?
This grand 'self image', in order to exist, must use techniques and people as fodder, as stepping stones to success. What is obscene is that the basis of fulfillment of this 'self-image' is the denial of the self.
Narcissism is the denial of the self. It is to reject the Gift of Life. A musician trying to play the role of the soldier (for women? for money?) would have his soul destroyed. Likewise, a soldier trying to play the role of musician (for women? for money?) also would find his soul destroyed. We have been taught, at the earliest ages of youth, that in order to 'get things done' and to 'make people happy', we must, on all levels, deny ourselves. In fact, I suspect that is why many men come to this forum in the first place. We have 'denied' ourselves women for so long but enough is enough!
What is a technique with woman but the fundamental denial of self? We are taught to act this way, do that, then this, and that over there, and perhaps we get the girl. But what was the cost? (There is ALWAYS a cost). By using some 'techniques' on the Internet, you never know if *you* can get women. Yes, techniques sell well because they are 'painless'. If anyone tells you something in life will be painless, they are, somehow, a salesman. Nevertheless, techniques are not an addition to your character but often a denial of it. No, being a Nice Guy does mean crash and burn. Rather than facing up to the hard questions of life and our own masculinitiy, it is much simpler and easier to adopt a series of techniques.
Narcissism's denial of the self permeates through today's society, as you have noticed. How often have you gone on a date with a woman and had her say everything you *think* she wants you to hear? Or how often do you find guys that act the way they think the 'women' want to hear? The technique wielding seducer and Nice Guy differ on how they act, but the context of their actions are entirely narcisstic. Even the 'good girls' and 'bad girls' suffer from this extreme self image. Reality to them is unseen. This is why they never seem to 'change' once their bodies reach that of an adult. Many people remain narcisstic for their entire lives.
I say: go do what you want! Go follow your dreams! Go embrace your passions! Go for the girl you think is 'out of your league' and super hot. Go for the fruits of life! Do NOT deprive yourself. When you do so, you slowly become embittered and turn that embitterness into a virtue. "Look how NICE I am to women." "Look how I sacrifice for my education/job/family/etc." The list goes on and on.
Our age today is mercenary labor and mercantile women. Everyone wants to leverage you for their own ends. But only you know what your dreams and passions are. Your dreams are now ripe for enjoyment. If you wait too long to enjoy it, it will be as bitter to the taste as defeat. Too many people deny themselves for 'tomorrow', always 'tomorrow'. We say, "Look at that dream up there! One day, it will come down." Rather, we ought to say, "Our hour has struck!"
Francisco mentioned "Atlas Shrugged". I would say "Fountainhead" is the superior book. For those who still think narcissism is about being 'selfish', just look at the character of Keating. Keating and Roark play opposite roles. Keating does whatever to please others. He even denies his heart to marry a 'beautiful woman'. Roark does only what pleases himself and pursues his own passions. In the end, Keating becomes broken while Roark wins the world. The point is that both characters face severe pain (for pain will occur to you in life. If anyone tells you differently, they are a salesman). Roark, taking the mindset of freedom, dealt with the pain at front. Keating, adopting the mindset of security, avoids pain at every turn and it ends up consuming him.
We can either avoid the pain and "shocks that flesh is heir to", or we can tackle it head on and be man not for women, not for society, not for your parents, not for your church, but for ourselves, as being a man is the closest males can get to heaven on Earth.
Securities Vs. Mistakes
There I am, minding my own business on my computer, when a message pops up to scream,
"W00t! Eh git da Pook! Tale me, Puke, whut cun eh dew ta git da woa-men?"
And then appears one of the following lines:
"How do I approach?"
"What do I say?"
"How do you call her?"
"How do I get laid easier?"
"Where do I meet the girls?"
"How do I increase my testosterone?"
"Tell me how to be a Man."
"What cologne should I put on?"
"Which are the clothes that women like?"
"Should I walk with swagger or not?"
"Facial hair or not?"
"Should I use more action verbs in my speech?"
"What sexual position should I use?"
"What date should I do?"
"Should I be ambitious, artistic, or just domineering?"
Gentlemen, if I attempt to answer your every request, I shall be here until Doomsday. You come onto the forum and think, "If I obtain this information, my future with women shall be changed."
This is a bald-faced lie.
Your future is the same. It is only your past that keeps changing.
Nice Guy, Seducer, Cocky Guy- what does it matter? You’re looking for guarantees. Then you change your past (“I lost to the women because I was sheepish and not cocky enough”). Maybe you have different results. But then it goes back to the way it was. And you search for more information. And then you change your past again (“oh, I lost to the women because I lacked testosterone within me”). Maybe you have different results. But then it goes back to the way it was. And you search for something else...
On and on it goes. So excuse me for not giving you a traditional answer. Let me answer you in another way.
It is to know the difference between a security and a mistake. 'Securities' What is a 'security'? It is a calculus of action. It is a planned way of thought, of movement, of talk, and of love. For example, anchoring conversation with "notice something about her” is a 'security'. It implies that if you talk about a necklace or something she is wearing, your odds for 'winning' are better. Here is another 'security'. "A cool fast car!" Since it is observed that women like the cool fast cars, guys will get them because they believe it boosts their chances of getting the girl.
All seduction techniques are 'securities'. All NLP is a 'security'. The entire idea is to boost your chances of getting the girl.
Self-improvement is readily a good thing. But a very big problem (or should I say cancer?) occurs when self-improvement becomes a 'security'. The idea that improving yourself, in this or that way, will boost your chances. But the problem is that it never stops. Go into a gym and you will find many single guys working out. They will remain there because they always think they have to be perfect to get the ladies! Watch television and you will see ads implying that if you wear this shampoo, you will have this social life, eat this brand of rice, and your romantic life will look like this, on and on and on. Use this product and you will be "perfect" it implies. Well, perfect is boring.
Take a young man asking some guy on the internet where should he go for the date? What should he eat? What should he wear? Which restaurant should he go to? What should he talk about? (And yes, he even asks) What sexual position should I use? Should I kiss her here or there?
He thinks, Eh em ubtaining all dis infoormadion! W00t! Luk dat mee!
But I'm shaking my head thinking, My goodness! This guy is letting a stranger from the internet define his love life! He doesn't know where he wants to go, what he wants to eat, what to talk about, or what to wear.
Women will look at such a guy with the same attitude.
A 'security' is an act or thought that makes you eliminate mistakes. It is one thing to foresee mistakes (after all, you can't just marry any girl), but it is disaster to life to deny them. You want misery in your life? Keep sucking up 'securities' to mold and sculpt your life.
Mistakes
I cannot speak for others, but I will tell you the BIG reason why I became successful with women. I was willing to lose girls when I had no girls, and I was willing to spend the time when I had no time.
What does this mean Willing to lose girls when I had no girls?
Let me use a money analogy. Let us say you were born poor. Most people remain poor because they cling so tightly to the pennies they have that they won’t risk losing it in any investment. So they not only lose out with the big money, they remain with pennies their entire life.
Now look at many men. Many guys remain single or in an LTR with a mediocre girl because they cling so tightly to the one girl in their worlds that they won’t risk or go back to singledom. (Most girls stay with a mediocre male precisely because of this reason). It is like an ant saying to another, “Don’t eat that leaf else we starve!” forgetting that they are in a bountiful forest.
When one love dies, another is reborn. Nature will not tolerate a vacuum. Single guys will have women thrown at them, provided they aren’t living life in securities. If you tiptoe with women, you cannot stand! You flop and fall over if you get out of balance. And that is what it is like living a life of securities… I know, I did it far too long. It is like walking a tight beam and ‘balancing’ against every gust and breeze. It is exhausting. This is why many following this path want to give up on women because it seems like ‘so much work’.
If you don’t have money, how can you be scared of losing money? And if you don’t have women, how can you be scared of losing them? It is like you’re fighting for the scraps, literally SCRAPS, of joy while your dreams sit on the table, rotting and growing cold with time.
And what does it mean to spend time when I had no time?
Most people don’t live in the present. They live in the ‘future’. They say, “Tomorrow! All my dreams will occur tomorrow!” Never does the person say, “Today!” So time passes and passes.
I will bet that most guys here, who are sincerely interested in getting better with women, were late bloomers in life. Let’s face it. If you have not dated or did anything with girls, you are certainly going to be a bit uncertain about it!
“My problem is that I need more experience.” I don’t think so. I think the big problem (of which I, too, am very much guilty of) is not embracing my dreams for today and waiting for tomorrow. I would see a pretty girl and go, “No! Can’t ask her out! Got too much stuff to do this week!” This occurred throughout years. But as time passed, melancholy increased and increased until you hated being single. It was as if an internal pressure came. You go after women because the pain of being single is now greater than ‘ceding your desires for tomorrow’.
Is that what it has come to? The choice between lesser of two pains? Is this life? You didn’t live like that when you were a child. You used to explore, play, and try out new things! Why has life become harder and more unbearable?
Again, it comes to your context on ‘securities’ vs. ‘mistakes’. I ask, “What mistakes does a child make?” I’m sure you can think of something like forgetting to turn off the light, leaving the oven on, or something of the sort. This is from the adult’s point of view. From the child’s point of view, he wasn’t making any mistakes. Cut his finger? Hurt his leg? Tired out? No mistakes here! Why, he was exploring! Every child loves to explore. There is so much in life to see! A child, instinctively, knows this.
But we somehow overpower this when we grow older. When you say something *wrong* with a woman and she leaves, you think you made a ‘mistake’ and feel bad. Well, why do you have to feel bad? Everyone’s made mistakes before. So what?
Get that child’s perspective once again of feeling that the world was new when you were young. You are exploring with love and life, not making ‘mistakes’. And even the worst mistake is preferable to a lifetime embracing the greatest of ‘securities’. The zest of life is in the roll of the dice.
So look at your love life. Is it a life of ‘securities’ or is it a life of ‘mistakes’? Is it a ‘calculus of action’ or spontaneous?
Look at your financial life, social life, and even intellectual life. Are they leashed to ‘securities’ or are they free, wild, and allowed to explore?
“But Pook, my perspective uses the word ‘strategies’. Your perspective uses the word ‘securities’. We are saying the same thing but using different contexts. But we are both using the word ‘mistake’ in my perspective! Tell me, goodly Pook, what word do you use, in your perspective, for my label of ‘mistake’?”
Freedom.
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Sunday, August 22, 2004
Saturday, August 21, 2004
Pook #52 - A Second Life
A young man approached this post, opened his mouth as but to speak, and snorted,
“Signor Pook! Or how is it that you like to be called, Monsieur Pook? Well then, bon jour! There is French salutation for your French slop!”
Counterfeit not the time, goodly sir. Speak your complaint.
“All you do in these posts is rattle and prattle about women and dreams and things. Tell me, in direct and utter language, why I do not right now have a woman in my arms.”
When you say you don’t have women, you are choosing it.
“This is cruel,” he whispered. But it is the truth. You know you can go out right now and get a girl. The girl might be a fat hag, but nevertheless, she is a girl. You CHOOSE to not go for the fat hag and decide that you are worth more.
Loneliness isn’t some cruel conspiracy from Nature; it is your choice. So you have chosen not to be with the ugly fat women.
Now that you have acknowledged that you choose the beautiful women, it means you think they are right for you. Even though you might be a skinny socially insecure dork, you believe you have inside you what it takes to get the beautiful woman.
So you must go out and demo it to reality. Nature says, “You silly little dork! Who are you to think that you can get my lovely nymphs, the beautiful women?” The proper response is: “I will show you who I really am!”
And one by one you become yourself, you reconnect all your dreams to the day. You don’t bulk up because women ‘like’ big guys. You do it because that is how you see yourself. You don’t become the life of the party because women ‘like’ those guys. You do it because that is who you are. You do not become Don Juan because that is what women crave, you do it because it is who you are.
What is life to you?
It is the pattern of our age that value is placed on living a long life. Because of this pattern of value being place on having a long life, it is easy to lose sight that the reason we hope to live long is so we have more time to live worthily.
What does it mean to live worthily? This is something that only you can define. People have lots of opinions on what you should do with your life, but when the day comes that you are on your deathbed, knowing the imminent is possible, you’re the one that has to reflect upon the choices you made.
So… what is life to you?
I am not asking you to do this or that with your life, but I am only asking you to pause for a moment and think. What is life to you? Stop and look.
Many people do not stop to consider. They relive their parent’s life, only to produce children who will live like them! They want money so they spend their time to get it, only to use that money to buy back time. They always place their minds in the future and never in the present, thus they don’t live in the present or in the future. They lose the moments… and in the end, that is all we have. This trading of time for money, or money for time, or present for future, or future for present is not a pure exchange, life gets destroyed in the transaction.
Change is hard.
Being a Nice Guy is the easiest thing to do. But in the end, the Nice Guy is a trap, the trap being the womb of security the Nice Guy keeps running into.
Routine is easy. Change or anything new, this is hard. To take your lifelong habits and alter them, this takes some pain. It will be the pain of shrugging off the old life, the life your parents gave you, the life your school gave you, the life your friends shared with you, the life that everyone expects you to live… except yourself.
You only have one life and only have a certain amount of time. You may have been raised to believe that life is not meant to be enjoyed, but something to bare, to be painfully suffered through. It is the belief that if you’re having too much fun, then you’re not doing enough ‘stuff’.
Who says life is not meant to be enjoyed? And who is meant to define that but you? Those who have this way of thought will think:
“Approaching women!? OH NO! Too painful!”
“Having a girlfriend is like having another job.”
“Women just require too much work to be enjoyed.”
Who says that women are not meant to be enjoyed? Who says that life is not meant to be enjoyed? And who is meant to define that but you?
“Life is whatever happens.”
Who says that? Who says you have to suffer?
With all that is out there to achieve and enjoy, to discover and see, who is to say that it is not yours? Who is to say that you don’t deserve joy in your life? Who is to say you don’t deserve the hot babes? And why do you sit on the sidelines and surrender it to others? Who’s to say all these things are not yours?
You define your life. Not your grandparents, church, or friends. When you give up those rules to someone else, YOU are to blame if you don’t like where you are at.
We are not raised this way. We are taught when we are young that it is noble to suffer. We are taught to not speak our mind else we might ‘offend’ someone. We are taught to be ‘quiet and good’ when your parents dragged you to places you hated. We are taught to sit through the monstrosity called education, making us confused that education comes only with pain, thus we naturally avoid pleasurable education the rest of our life. We are taught to always avoid risks when possible and embrace a nice secure life. We are taught… nothing that makes us alive.
Some people think that we are meant to suffer each day, to gruel through the time and bear the scourge of daily agonies. If you believe you are underemployed, ask yourself, “Is my life dictated by my FEAR of not having a job or is it launched by the PLEASURE of working a job I like and getting more money?” If you do not have a woman, ask yourself, “Am I focusing on minimizing the pains of approaching, dating, and loving or am I focused on obtaining the pleasures of such wonder?”
Most people will never start a business because nine out of ten companies fail. But those that win, in the end, even if they fail at first keep trying because they are motivated by the pleasure of getting the business, not by minimizing pain and insecurity.
And many guys will never get a girl they want because they realize they will fail more often then they succeed. But those that win in the end do so by focusing on the pleasures of success rather than the pain of failure.
So if you have no women, it means you think you are better then what you can get. You can either go out to show the world what you are, or you can come up with another ‘daily excuse’. In order for that happy tomorrow to occur, you need to start today.
You set the rules for your life. It will have as much pain, joy, and success you think you deserve. The world now begins with you. What is your world going to be?
Most People Fake Happiness
There is a great myth that everyone, amazingly, believes: that everyone else is happy, having fun, living life, and you, all alone, are miserable. That everyone is out there, having amazing glorious sex, while you must content yourself with pornos.
This isn’t true. Most people are in the exact same spot as you are. And those ‘glorious unions’ you see everywhere? Most of them are simply scared of being alone, so they go off and grab the nearest available person. The others are 'lying' together with vanity.
The big secret is that happy people aren’t as happy as they appear. Many happy people are actually covering up their real problems. But what do you do? You see one of these ‘happy’ people and then you get unhappy at them! You make yourselves miserable as you arrow nasty thoughts from your mind at them, and they don’t even know you.
You think, “It must be nice to be happy. They were born to the right parents, to the right environment. I wish I was like them. I wish I grew up where they did.”
You think, “I have all these great qualities about myself. Why can’t someone see it?” Well, no one sees it because they are too worried about themselves. Women are not ignoring you; they too are worried about themselves. When you go out with a foxy lady, she will be worried about how she acts, about how you think of her.
Life is meant to be lived, life is meant to be grabbed on to, life is meant to be defined by you. No one may define your life, not your parents, not people on the Internet, no one.
A Second Life
Now your life belongs to yourself. What are you going to do with it? This Gift of life is yours and yours alone. It truly is the only thing no one can take away. Only you can give it away, to chunk it, to toss it into the abyss of time. But no longer will you do that.
Before, you crawled and inched your way through life. Now, cocooned and reabsorbed with your new thoughts, you molt off your old life and begin a new one. The other caterpillars, feeding on their grubs and inching in circles, look up at the sky to see you blaze by.
“How can he fly so high?”
“How is he so colorful?”
“How can he be so free?”
Nothing can stop you now except yourself. You now have the power to do what you’ve always dreamed, what are you going to do? The inner light of who you really are has broken out and will dazzle the world. You are so lucky, for you have saved your life. Now you know how precious life is because you were so close to ageing without discovering it.
And so people will notice the new you. Before I came here, I was mad for a girl. Now, that same girl looks at me and stares. “Something is different,” she says. “Something in your eyes… in your face…” Shrugging, she smiled. “It must be the light.”
I kissed her and pulled her to me. "Yes,” I said. “It must be the light."
.
“Signor Pook! Or how is it that you like to be called, Monsieur Pook? Well then, bon jour! There is French salutation for your French slop!”
Counterfeit not the time, goodly sir. Speak your complaint.
“All you do in these posts is rattle and prattle about women and dreams and things. Tell me, in direct and utter language, why I do not right now have a woman in my arms.”
When you say you don’t have women, you are choosing it.
“This is cruel,” he whispered. But it is the truth. You know you can go out right now and get a girl. The girl might be a fat hag, but nevertheless, she is a girl. You CHOOSE to not go for the fat hag and decide that you are worth more.
Loneliness isn’t some cruel conspiracy from Nature; it is your choice. So you have chosen not to be with the ugly fat women.
Now that you have acknowledged that you choose the beautiful women, it means you think they are right for you. Even though you might be a skinny socially insecure dork, you believe you have inside you what it takes to get the beautiful woman.
So you must go out and demo it to reality. Nature says, “You silly little dork! Who are you to think that you can get my lovely nymphs, the beautiful women?” The proper response is: “I will show you who I really am!”
And one by one you become yourself, you reconnect all your dreams to the day. You don’t bulk up because women ‘like’ big guys. You do it because that is how you see yourself. You don’t become the life of the party because women ‘like’ those guys. You do it because that is who you are. You do not become Don Juan because that is what women crave, you do it because it is who you are.
What is life to you?
It is the pattern of our age that value is placed on living a long life. Because of this pattern of value being place on having a long life, it is easy to lose sight that the reason we hope to live long is so we have more time to live worthily.
What does it mean to live worthily? This is something that only you can define. People have lots of opinions on what you should do with your life, but when the day comes that you are on your deathbed, knowing the imminent is possible, you’re the one that has to reflect upon the choices you made.
So… what is life to you?
I am not asking you to do this or that with your life, but I am only asking you to pause for a moment and think. What is life to you? Stop and look.
Many people do not stop to consider. They relive their parent’s life, only to produce children who will live like them! They want money so they spend their time to get it, only to use that money to buy back time. They always place their minds in the future and never in the present, thus they don’t live in the present or in the future. They lose the moments… and in the end, that is all we have. This trading of time for money, or money for time, or present for future, or future for present is not a pure exchange, life gets destroyed in the transaction.
Change is hard.
Being a Nice Guy is the easiest thing to do. But in the end, the Nice Guy is a trap, the trap being the womb of security the Nice Guy keeps running into.
Routine is easy. Change or anything new, this is hard. To take your lifelong habits and alter them, this takes some pain. It will be the pain of shrugging off the old life, the life your parents gave you, the life your school gave you, the life your friends shared with you, the life that everyone expects you to live… except yourself.
You only have one life and only have a certain amount of time. You may have been raised to believe that life is not meant to be enjoyed, but something to bare, to be painfully suffered through. It is the belief that if you’re having too much fun, then you’re not doing enough ‘stuff’.
Who says life is not meant to be enjoyed? And who is meant to define that but you? Those who have this way of thought will think:
“Approaching women!? OH NO! Too painful!”
“Having a girlfriend is like having another job.”
“Women just require too much work to be enjoyed.”
Who says that women are not meant to be enjoyed? Who says that life is not meant to be enjoyed? And who is meant to define that but you?
“Life is whatever happens.”
Who says that? Who says you have to suffer?
With all that is out there to achieve and enjoy, to discover and see, who is to say that it is not yours? Who is to say that you don’t deserve joy in your life? Who is to say you don’t deserve the hot babes? And why do you sit on the sidelines and surrender it to others? Who’s to say all these things are not yours?
You define your life. Not your grandparents, church, or friends. When you give up those rules to someone else, YOU are to blame if you don’t like where you are at.
We are not raised this way. We are taught when we are young that it is noble to suffer. We are taught to not speak our mind else we might ‘offend’ someone. We are taught to be ‘quiet and good’ when your parents dragged you to places you hated. We are taught to sit through the monstrosity called education, making us confused that education comes only with pain, thus we naturally avoid pleasurable education the rest of our life. We are taught to always avoid risks when possible and embrace a nice secure life. We are taught… nothing that makes us alive.
Some people think that we are meant to suffer each day, to gruel through the time and bear the scourge of daily agonies. If you believe you are underemployed, ask yourself, “Is my life dictated by my FEAR of not having a job or is it launched by the PLEASURE of working a job I like and getting more money?” If you do not have a woman, ask yourself, “Am I focusing on minimizing the pains of approaching, dating, and loving or am I focused on obtaining the pleasures of such wonder?”
Most people will never start a business because nine out of ten companies fail. But those that win, in the end, even if they fail at first keep trying because they are motivated by the pleasure of getting the business, not by minimizing pain and insecurity.
And many guys will never get a girl they want because they realize they will fail more often then they succeed. But those that win in the end do so by focusing on the pleasures of success rather than the pain of failure.
So if you have no women, it means you think you are better then what you can get. You can either go out to show the world what you are, or you can come up with another ‘daily excuse’. In order for that happy tomorrow to occur, you need to start today.
You set the rules for your life. It will have as much pain, joy, and success you think you deserve. The world now begins with you. What is your world going to be?
Most People Fake Happiness
There is a great myth that everyone, amazingly, believes: that everyone else is happy, having fun, living life, and you, all alone, are miserable. That everyone is out there, having amazing glorious sex, while you must content yourself with pornos.
This isn’t true. Most people are in the exact same spot as you are. And those ‘glorious unions’ you see everywhere? Most of them are simply scared of being alone, so they go off and grab the nearest available person. The others are 'lying' together with vanity.
The big secret is that happy people aren’t as happy as they appear. Many happy people are actually covering up their real problems. But what do you do? You see one of these ‘happy’ people and then you get unhappy at them! You make yourselves miserable as you arrow nasty thoughts from your mind at them, and they don’t even know you.
You think, “It must be nice to be happy. They were born to the right parents, to the right environment. I wish I was like them. I wish I grew up where they did.”
You think, “I have all these great qualities about myself. Why can’t someone see it?” Well, no one sees it because they are too worried about themselves. Women are not ignoring you; they too are worried about themselves. When you go out with a foxy lady, she will be worried about how she acts, about how you think of her.
Life is meant to be lived, life is meant to be grabbed on to, life is meant to be defined by you. No one may define your life, not your parents, not people on the Internet, no one.
A Second Life
Now your life belongs to yourself. What are you going to do with it? This Gift of life is yours and yours alone. It truly is the only thing no one can take away. Only you can give it away, to chunk it, to toss it into the abyss of time. But no longer will you do that.
Before, you crawled and inched your way through life. Now, cocooned and reabsorbed with your new thoughts, you molt off your old life and begin a new one. The other caterpillars, feeding on their grubs and inching in circles, look up at the sky to see you blaze by.
“How can he fly so high?”
“How is he so colorful?”
“How can he be so free?”
Nothing can stop you now except yourself. You now have the power to do what you’ve always dreamed, what are you going to do? The inner light of who you really are has broken out and will dazzle the world. You are so lucky, for you have saved your life. Now you know how precious life is because you were so close to ageing without discovering it.
And so people will notice the new you. Before I came here, I was mad for a girl. Now, that same girl looks at me and stares. “Something is different,” she says. “Something in your eyes… in your face…” Shrugging, she smiled. “It must be the light.”
I kissed her and pulled her to me. "Yes,” I said. “It must be the light."
.
Friday, August 20, 2004
Pook #51 - Ooh La La!
Ooh la la!
That is what is going through the Don Juan’s mind.
Ooh la la!
For this is the only thing that is in a Don Juan’s head when he is with the lovely young lady!
Lady La Hotness! Ooh la la!
“Monsieur Pook! Ooh la la!”
But many guys do not have ‘ooh la la’ in their heads. Rather, they have, “Am I funny enough? Am I interesting enough to her? Am I doing this correctly with no mistakes? Oh heavens, help me!”
There is no woman in front of such a male. No, the woman becomes something else, a harbringer of lost dreams, security for their emotions, or a magical device that will make them become cool. I cannot believe guys have such problems approaching women. What are they scared of?
“The thought of sex turn me to stone!” No wonder you stand there, gazing at your Medusa in such manner. Keep things in their proper spheres. When you go to talk to a woman, focus on the talking. When you go to date the woman, focus on the date. When you go to sleep with the woman… well…
Ooh la la!
When you are talking of her and thinking of sex, or having sex and focus on talking to her, you are not going to do either very well! When you kiss her, just think of kissing her. When you are approaching, think of talking to her.
But you protest…
Women and Happiness
You say: “My emotions are undone!” and you turn to a woman. But a woman is not a giant breast that fills itself with milk. Nor are the lacteal veins of such woman supplied with ‘happiness’ from a source outside herself. What you put into the woman is what you get out. And your view of women stuffed with this ‘happy juice’, this milk that swells the giant breast you yearn to suckle, is but a mirage, one that will lead you off the cliff. You have your ‘emotional owies’ and want to suck on femininity (no matter how much the femininity dribbles down your body) to nourish your ‘pains’. Women don’t want to be your mother. When guys go at women from this position, it is no wonder they fail (as they deserve to).
Women and Success
You say: “My life is in circles!” and you turn to a woman. But a woman is not, in herself, a torch of glory that shines her light abroad. No matter how much sex you have, no matter how many girls you go through, you still have to pay your rent, go to work, and labor to live. More girls will not transform your sorry life. Women despise boys that stay mediocre with no ambition, no plans, no goals, no dreams, and will leave them for MEN.
Women and Life
You say, “My life is boring!” and you turn to a woman. But a woman is not an entertainment center as evident by lack of a mute or even a good volume control. They do not turn on and off at the flip of a switch, nor is their programming run by a logical schedule. Healthy women will react to you, “What a bore you are!” and off they go to the nearest man who has his stuff together. The secret to interesting people is that they find interest in almost everything. What do YOU do? Sit and surf the Internet? No, remember the order of Live, Laugh, and Love. 99% of problems come from people mixing up the order, going for Laugh before Live, or Love before Laugh. Instead of focusing on girls to get a life, get a life and love will attend to itself.
Ooh La La to get the women!
First, you must talk to them.
“Madame, how do you do?”
“Very well! How are you?”
Women would prefer talking to anyone than be alone. So she will be receptive to you talking to her.
But how do you display your interest in her? With a sonnet? With a pick-up line? No, keep talking to her but channel your interest through your eyes.
First Channel: Eye Contact
“My, that is mighty weather we are having.”
“Yes, it is mighty weather indeed!”
Most women will notice your eye contact. (Remember, women love the eyes for a reason. The reason we know why is because that is where they first detect male desire.) They will think, “this is different. This guy is keeping eye contact.” Most males are too scared. So she will keep the eye contact and keep talking to you, as you have already touched something within her.
Eye contact is very important. You DO NOT stop it. You do not look gazingly into her eyes and then stop later on. You keep it up, displaying your desire for her, and you keep staring into her eyes even during intercourse (girls love it when guys stare at their eyes during sex for a reason. Why? Because female satisfaction is influenced by male desire. Sleep with her without looking at her eyes, she will feel used. If you’ve watched lesbians make love, you will find them constantly staring into each other’s eyes.)
Now, she will REALLY notice if you start asking about her.
Second Channel: Asking About Her
"Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah."
"Forget that, my dear, and tell me about you."
I used to think that by asking about her you are ‘attracting her’ by showing you are unselfish in the conversation. This is totally untrue. You are being ENTIRELY selfish because you want to get to know her. You are evaluating her. Why do you do this? BECAUSE YOU WANT HER.
By NOT asking about her, you will lose because you will not be thinking, “I want her” but rather, “I want her to want me!”.
To be male is to WANT, to be female is to be WANTED. Yes, girls go herd like after a guy but that is female competition, not true male attraction. When you REALLY WANT a girl, you will want to know everything about them: what their hobbies are, what are their plans for the future, what is their shoe size is, whether they can digest asparagus properly, these things you want to know.
Often, the girl will toss the question back. You reply simply and casually as possible. “Well, where are you working at now?” “I worked my way out of working.” And then you go to the next question. Don’t worry, she will ask it again if she wants to know. I like to give yes answers to their questions. One girl went, “Are you going to college?” “Yes.” Next year, when she saw me she knew to ask, “Where are you going to college?” When women like a guy, they remember everything about him.
You are not there to prove yourself to her. She is there to prove herself to you! If she likes you, she will start rambling out this information about her. What she likes, what she plans to do, her ambitions, so on and so on.
Third Channel: Touch
If you feel it in your gut, do it! If you do not have "Ooh la la" in your head, you will do something completely off. So touch her when you think you should, kiss here when you think you should, and so on.
Pook noticed the girl looked very cute and so took her in his arms.
"Ooh la la!" she squeals.
Pook noticed she sat there, babbling endlessly, so to shut her up he kissed her.
"Ooh la la!" she laughs, pulling away.
Ooh la la! That is my philosophy! Let it be written in the sky, written in the stars, so your mind will wash away those old toxic analyzations.
Ooh la la! And this is our mission and destiny. Some people have so confused the easy life and the hard life as to think that the path of security of walking on eggshells throughout life will make their life easier. But it is when you throw yourself into the fire that you learn everything.
Analyzations, good-bye! And self-doubt, farewell! No glory lives on the back of such. And Don Juan, dream on. Life awaits!
Ooh la la! Come sirs, drink this tonic I am handing you. No more doubts, no more 'what ifs', no more stupid suspicion of whether she is 'manipulating' us or not. Drink, drink, and put it down the hatch!
Ooh la la! Join me ladies, let us sing it together.
The ladies gather and squeak,
"Ooh la la!"
Say it again, ladies. Come on, one more time!
"Ooh la la!"
Oh, and there is a Nice Guy that has wandered into this post. Look, we can see the sweat of frustration popping from his forehead. Say it with me, Nice Guy, say it!
"Ooh la la!"
Again!
"Ooh la la!"
And, alas, several more beings of melancholy have stumbled into the post. Here comes forth a philosopher, so sad and teary eyed, not knowing what life is about. And, following him, is a seductionist, stuffed with analyzations and flowing electronic text, bitter that the 'reality' of women seem so 'horrible'. And there comes a young man who has lost the girl of his dreams, who doesn't realize that it was the dream that made her divine, not her making the dream, and he's green with jealousy, as he doesn't think he'll ever find another woman 'of his dreams'.
Come, sirs, you depress me. Say it together!
"Ooh la la!"
Again! Again!
"Ooh la la!"
You are going to approach a woman! What is on your mind?
"Ooh la la!"
Oh, and she is receptive to talking to you! Now what could you think?
"Ooh la la!"
You asked her out and she said yes! Now, what will be going on in your head on the marvelous and enchanting date?
"Ooh la la! Ooh la la! Ooh la la!"
You're kissing her! You're making out with her! She is getting undressed! My goodness! What is in your head?
"Ooh la la!"
Pity the fools in life, who martyr their love life on a calculus of analyzation! Go out there now with a smile on your lips and a spring in your step! Keep in mind this Commandment of Life. All together now!
"Ooh la la!"
That is what is going through the Don Juan’s mind.
Ooh la la!
For this is the only thing that is in a Don Juan’s head when he is with the lovely young lady!
Lady La Hotness! Ooh la la!
“Monsieur Pook! Ooh la la!”
But many guys do not have ‘ooh la la’ in their heads. Rather, they have, “Am I funny enough? Am I interesting enough to her? Am I doing this correctly with no mistakes? Oh heavens, help me!”
There is no woman in front of such a male. No, the woman becomes something else, a harbringer of lost dreams, security for their emotions, or a magical device that will make them become cool. I cannot believe guys have such problems approaching women. What are they scared of?
“The thought of sex turn me to stone!” No wonder you stand there, gazing at your Medusa in such manner. Keep things in their proper spheres. When you go to talk to a woman, focus on the talking. When you go to date the woman, focus on the date. When you go to sleep with the woman… well…
Ooh la la!
When you are talking of her and thinking of sex, or having sex and focus on talking to her, you are not going to do either very well! When you kiss her, just think of kissing her. When you are approaching, think of talking to her.
But you protest…
Women and Happiness
You say: “My emotions are undone!” and you turn to a woman. But a woman is not a giant breast that fills itself with milk. Nor are the lacteal veins of such woman supplied with ‘happiness’ from a source outside herself. What you put into the woman is what you get out. And your view of women stuffed with this ‘happy juice’, this milk that swells the giant breast you yearn to suckle, is but a mirage, one that will lead you off the cliff. You have your ‘emotional owies’ and want to suck on femininity (no matter how much the femininity dribbles down your body) to nourish your ‘pains’. Women don’t want to be your mother. When guys go at women from this position, it is no wonder they fail (as they deserve to).
Women and Success
You say: “My life is in circles!” and you turn to a woman. But a woman is not, in herself, a torch of glory that shines her light abroad. No matter how much sex you have, no matter how many girls you go through, you still have to pay your rent, go to work, and labor to live. More girls will not transform your sorry life. Women despise boys that stay mediocre with no ambition, no plans, no goals, no dreams, and will leave them for MEN.
Women and Life
You say, “My life is boring!” and you turn to a woman. But a woman is not an entertainment center as evident by lack of a mute or even a good volume control. They do not turn on and off at the flip of a switch, nor is their programming run by a logical schedule. Healthy women will react to you, “What a bore you are!” and off they go to the nearest man who has his stuff together. The secret to interesting people is that they find interest in almost everything. What do YOU do? Sit and surf the Internet? No, remember the order of Live, Laugh, and Love. 99% of problems come from people mixing up the order, going for Laugh before Live, or Love before Laugh. Instead of focusing on girls to get a life, get a life and love will attend to itself.
Ooh La La to get the women!
First, you must talk to them.
“Madame, how do you do?”
“Very well! How are you?”
Women would prefer talking to anyone than be alone. So she will be receptive to you talking to her.
But how do you display your interest in her? With a sonnet? With a pick-up line? No, keep talking to her but channel your interest through your eyes.
First Channel: Eye Contact
“My, that is mighty weather we are having.”
“Yes, it is mighty weather indeed!”
Most women will notice your eye contact. (Remember, women love the eyes for a reason. The reason we know why is because that is where they first detect male desire.) They will think, “this is different. This guy is keeping eye contact.” Most males are too scared. So she will keep the eye contact and keep talking to you, as you have already touched something within her.
Eye contact is very important. You DO NOT stop it. You do not look gazingly into her eyes and then stop later on. You keep it up, displaying your desire for her, and you keep staring into her eyes even during intercourse (girls love it when guys stare at their eyes during sex for a reason. Why? Because female satisfaction is influenced by male desire. Sleep with her without looking at her eyes, she will feel used. If you’ve watched lesbians make love, you will find them constantly staring into each other’s eyes.)
Now, she will REALLY notice if you start asking about her.
Second Channel: Asking About Her
"Blah blah blah. Blah blah blah."
"Forget that, my dear, and tell me about you."
I used to think that by asking about her you are ‘attracting her’ by showing you are unselfish in the conversation. This is totally untrue. You are being ENTIRELY selfish because you want to get to know her. You are evaluating her. Why do you do this? BECAUSE YOU WANT HER.
By NOT asking about her, you will lose because you will not be thinking, “I want her” but rather, “I want her to want me!”.
To be male is to WANT, to be female is to be WANTED. Yes, girls go herd like after a guy but that is female competition, not true male attraction. When you REALLY WANT a girl, you will want to know everything about them: what their hobbies are, what are their plans for the future, what is their shoe size is, whether they can digest asparagus properly, these things you want to know.
Often, the girl will toss the question back. You reply simply and casually as possible. “Well, where are you working at now?” “I worked my way out of working.” And then you go to the next question. Don’t worry, she will ask it again if she wants to know. I like to give yes answers to their questions. One girl went, “Are you going to college?” “Yes.” Next year, when she saw me she knew to ask, “Where are you going to college?” When women like a guy, they remember everything about him.
You are not there to prove yourself to her. She is there to prove herself to you! If she likes you, she will start rambling out this information about her. What she likes, what she plans to do, her ambitions, so on and so on.
Third Channel: Touch
If you feel it in your gut, do it! If you do not have "Ooh la la" in your head, you will do something completely off. So touch her when you think you should, kiss here when you think you should, and so on.
Pook noticed the girl looked very cute and so took her in his arms.
"Ooh la la!" she squeals.
Pook noticed she sat there, babbling endlessly, so to shut her up he kissed her.
"Ooh la la!" she laughs, pulling away.
Ooh la la! That is my philosophy! Let it be written in the sky, written in the stars, so your mind will wash away those old toxic analyzations.
Ooh la la! And this is our mission and destiny. Some people have so confused the easy life and the hard life as to think that the path of security of walking on eggshells throughout life will make their life easier. But it is when you throw yourself into the fire that you learn everything.
Analyzations, good-bye! And self-doubt, farewell! No glory lives on the back of such. And Don Juan, dream on. Life awaits!
Ooh la la! Come sirs, drink this tonic I am handing you. No more doubts, no more 'what ifs', no more stupid suspicion of whether she is 'manipulating' us or not. Drink, drink, and put it down the hatch!
Ooh la la! Join me ladies, let us sing it together.
The ladies gather and squeak,
"Ooh la la!"
Say it again, ladies. Come on, one more time!
"Ooh la la!"
Oh, and there is a Nice Guy that has wandered into this post. Look, we can see the sweat of frustration popping from his forehead. Say it with me, Nice Guy, say it!
"Ooh la la!"
Again!
"Ooh la la!"
And, alas, several more beings of melancholy have stumbled into the post. Here comes forth a philosopher, so sad and teary eyed, not knowing what life is about. And, following him, is a seductionist, stuffed with analyzations and flowing electronic text, bitter that the 'reality' of women seem so 'horrible'. And there comes a young man who has lost the girl of his dreams, who doesn't realize that it was the dream that made her divine, not her making the dream, and he's green with jealousy, as he doesn't think he'll ever find another woman 'of his dreams'.
Come, sirs, you depress me. Say it together!
"Ooh la la!"
Again! Again!
"Ooh la la!"
You are going to approach a woman! What is on your mind?
"Ooh la la!"
Oh, and she is receptive to talking to you! Now what could you think?
"Ooh la la!"
You asked her out and she said yes! Now, what will be going on in your head on the marvelous and enchanting date?
"Ooh la la! Ooh la la! Ooh la la!"
You're kissing her! You're making out with her! She is getting undressed! My goodness! What is in your head?
"Ooh la la!"
Pity the fools in life, who martyr their love life on a calculus of analyzation! Go out there now with a smile on your lips and a spring in your step! Keep in mind this Commandment of Life. All together now!
"Ooh la la!"
Thursday, August 19, 2004
Pook #50 - Patience: What Truly Makes a Don Juan
I have observed guys that had it all (looks, confidence, experience, and even interest from the women). I was envious of these guys for they seemed to know what they were doing and knew how to do it well. I was in awe of how they could be so smooth with the ladies. Their abilities amazed me.
Where I worked at, there were a couple of women who all the guys wanted. These women had initial interest in the guys mentioned above (and as you can imagine, those guys had quite a bit of interest in them). So the guys moved in for the kill. They unleashed their charm, their wit, their humor to get the women they so desperately desired.
In the end, both women had ditched these guys and went out with me.
So what happened? How could guys with more experience, confidence, wit, and looks be shot down by the most in-demand women in the area? And how could someone like me (who lacks in these certain areas) succeed when such smooth ladies-men fail?
It all has to do with patience. These guys failed because they came on entirely too strong, too fast. After a couple of dates, they wanted to marry the person. Though they were smooth, they could not hold back their desire for a girlfriend. The women sensed this and recoiled from them instantly.
Women, on initial dates, just simply want to have fun and have a good time. Men can throw too much affection too soon, too fast, and scare the woman off. Women find this as 'desperation'. It is the ultimate turn-off to them.
Patience is NOT inaction nor 'chickening' out. Not asking out a woman you're interested in is not being patient but being stupid. Patience is controlling your eagerness.
Have fun with the woman. Don't take your outings so seriously. A woman must feel comfortable and secure with you before intimacy can begin. The key to her feeling comfortable and secure is by having fun WITH YOU.
Patience is also outstanding at ATTRACTING women too. Those Mr. Smooth men I knew would be there at a second one of the women called their names. If she said, "Hi, [Mr. Smooth Dude's Name]" they would stop what they were doing and talk. I, on the other hand, simply greeted them back and KEPT WALKING. The Mr. Smooth men came across as eager and desperate by always willing to stop whatever they were doing to chit chat while I gave the impression of 'importance' and 'hard to obtain' by controlling my eagerness.
Older women (who are married and in their 40s, 50s) have told me that one of the most common mistakes guys can make is trying to jump into a strong relationship after only a couple of dates. They said that women simply want to have fun and that if the guy smothers her with affection, she will distance herself. After all, who wants to be with someone that appears eager and desperate?
Now I must choose between one of the two women I'm going out with (yes, going out with both). The Mr. Smooth guys now come TO ME and ask, "What's your secret? How were you able to get BOTH of them?" and I just smile.
Previous Pook Index Next
Related:
Pook #7 - Lesson Four: Patience is the Refined Sense of Confidence
Where I worked at, there were a couple of women who all the guys wanted. These women had initial interest in the guys mentioned above (and as you can imagine, those guys had quite a bit of interest in them). So the guys moved in for the kill. They unleashed their charm, their wit, their humor to get the women they so desperately desired.
In the end, both women had ditched these guys and went out with me.
So what happened? How could guys with more experience, confidence, wit, and looks be shot down by the most in-demand women in the area? And how could someone like me (who lacks in these certain areas) succeed when such smooth ladies-men fail?
It all has to do with patience. These guys failed because they came on entirely too strong, too fast. After a couple of dates, they wanted to marry the person. Though they were smooth, they could not hold back their desire for a girlfriend. The women sensed this and recoiled from them instantly.
Women, on initial dates, just simply want to have fun and have a good time. Men can throw too much affection too soon, too fast, and scare the woman off. Women find this as 'desperation'. It is the ultimate turn-off to them.
Patience is NOT inaction nor 'chickening' out. Not asking out a woman you're interested in is not being patient but being stupid. Patience is controlling your eagerness.
Have fun with the woman. Don't take your outings so seriously. A woman must feel comfortable and secure with you before intimacy can begin. The key to her feeling comfortable and secure is by having fun WITH YOU.
Patience is also outstanding at ATTRACTING women too. Those Mr. Smooth men I knew would be there at a second one of the women called their names. If she said, "Hi, [Mr. Smooth Dude's Name]" they would stop what they were doing and talk. I, on the other hand, simply greeted them back and KEPT WALKING. The Mr. Smooth men came across as eager and desperate by always willing to stop whatever they were doing to chit chat while I gave the impression of 'importance' and 'hard to obtain' by controlling my eagerness.
Older women (who are married and in their 40s, 50s) have told me that one of the most common mistakes guys can make is trying to jump into a strong relationship after only a couple of dates. They said that women simply want to have fun and that if the guy smothers her with affection, she will distance herself. After all, who wants to be with someone that appears eager and desperate?
Now I must choose between one of the two women I'm going out with (yes, going out with both). The Mr. Smooth guys now come TO ME and ask, "What's your secret? How were you able to get BOTH of them?" and I just smile.
Previous Pook Index Next
Related:
Pook #7 - Lesson Four: Patience is the Refined Sense of Confidence
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Pook #49 - On Mystery
The girls and everyone I know keep saying I'm a 'mystery'. I don't try to be. I don't intend to be. I even try to explain myself to them. Yet, the mystery (to them) remains. So mystery must be more than what you reveal.
Apparently, people try to define everyone else they meet. We try to place people in nicly cut slots to mark where they go. Girls do this all the time. They want to figure you out to decide what role you will have in their fantasy, if you should be relationship material for them or their friends, and so on (i.e. LOVER, FRIEND, or LOSER). If you keep defying the 'mold' they have for you, you will be christened a mystery.
Most people are static. A year from now, they will probably look the same, act the same, and be the same. But if you are in a state of flux, easily done through a self-improvement (or self-discovery if you will), every slot they try to stick you in will fail.
People see Pook.
"Look! He is athletic. He enjoys talking about sports. Therefore, he is a jock."
Pook then talks philosophy.
"Look at that! He must read books! Therefore, he is a nerd jock."
Pook then listens to the women.
"Oh, he is so sweet! He is such a Nice Guy!"
Pook then cycles through the women.
"How is this!? Pook is a Nice Guy Player!"
Pook then pisses off a woman.
"What ho! Pook is jerk-like!"
Pook then makes a speech.
"Look at him go! Pook is an orator! He must get his own radio show."
Pook then writes an essay for a paper.
"Wow! Pook must be a writer! Look at him go!"
And this goes on forever. In the end, they conclude Pook is a Nice Guy/ Player/ Jerk who's writer/orator and a nerd/jock. No wonder they are confused.
The longer they know me, the more of a mystery I am to them (because they've seen more change). They can only love Pook, never define him.
Anti-Dump advised shy guys to use their quietness as an advantage to not give themselves away. Terminator911 used the phrase, "The less she knows, the more she wants to know". These two were responding to how many guys turn their dates into Oprah and tell their pathetic life stories.
Women like men who are like mountains, solid with many layers because all women are gold-hunters, either for the gold of your potential or the gold you actually have. They like to dig through these layers. They get information but they know that there is more there. It frustrates her that she can't define you. She loves you because of this.
You don't withold information, you make her work to get it out (you are not to dictate your autobiography to her). But you're constantly changing. So once she has dug up a layer, the mountain has pushed up three layers higher. She (and you) are never bored and both of you are closer to the stars.
Compare THIS with the guy who is in stasis mode. She will go through his layers and his mountain just sits there. Soon, she thinks that the other mountains are taller, larger, more interesting to climb. She will say, "I am bored," dump you, and go for the next mountain because it's there.
People do not see mysteries in people they have not talked to/met. Why? Because there are lots of people they have not talked to. There is nothing mysterious in that. No, those people are delegated in her mind as part of the 'environment' or 'scenario' she is in. You only become real once you start interacting with her in some real way. The more values and time she gets from you, the more she will try to put you in a slot. If you are upwardly changing, she will be curious. "He is such a mystery!"
You want to be a mystery in this way rather than hiding your life (but no turning the girl into Oprah. That's just gross.) In this way, the more a person knows you, the more the person will see you as a mystery. This means your girl won't get bored. Her interest level will remain high.
And it will be through her doing! The word 'mystery' won't even go through your mind. She will think and ponder and create drama out of nothing (as women are quite good at doing). And the more she thinks about you, the more she will like you.
See? Don't try to force her mind into liking you. She wants to like you. By her finding reasons to like you as she tries to figure you out, she has convinced herself that you are worthy.
Previous Pook Index Next
Apparently, people try to define everyone else they meet. We try to place people in nicly cut slots to mark where they go. Girls do this all the time. They want to figure you out to decide what role you will have in their fantasy, if you should be relationship material for them or their friends, and so on (i.e. LOVER, FRIEND, or LOSER). If you keep defying the 'mold' they have for you, you will be christened a mystery.
Most people are static. A year from now, they will probably look the same, act the same, and be the same. But if you are in a state of flux, easily done through a self-improvement (or self-discovery if you will), every slot they try to stick you in will fail.
People see Pook.
"Look! He is athletic. He enjoys talking about sports. Therefore, he is a jock."
Pook then talks philosophy.
"Look at that! He must read books! Therefore, he is a nerd jock."
Pook then listens to the women.
"Oh, he is so sweet! He is such a Nice Guy!"
Pook then cycles through the women.
"How is this!? Pook is a Nice Guy Player!"
Pook then pisses off a woman.
"What ho! Pook is jerk-like!"
Pook then makes a speech.
"Look at him go! Pook is an orator! He must get his own radio show."
Pook then writes an essay for a paper.
"Wow! Pook must be a writer! Look at him go!"
And this goes on forever. In the end, they conclude Pook is a Nice Guy/ Player/ Jerk who's writer/orator and a nerd/jock. No wonder they are confused.
The longer they know me, the more of a mystery I am to them (because they've seen more change). They can only love Pook, never define him.
Anti-Dump advised shy guys to use their quietness as an advantage to not give themselves away. Terminator911 used the phrase, "The less she knows, the more she wants to know". These two were responding to how many guys turn their dates into Oprah and tell their pathetic life stories.
Women like men who are like mountains, solid with many layers because all women are gold-hunters, either for the gold of your potential or the gold you actually have. They like to dig through these layers. They get information but they know that there is more there. It frustrates her that she can't define you. She loves you because of this.
You don't withold information, you make her work to get it out (you are not to dictate your autobiography to her). But you're constantly changing. So once she has dug up a layer, the mountain has pushed up three layers higher. She (and you) are never bored and both of you are closer to the stars.
Compare THIS with the guy who is in stasis mode. She will go through his layers and his mountain just sits there. Soon, she thinks that the other mountains are taller, larger, more interesting to climb. She will say, "I am bored," dump you, and go for the next mountain because it's there.
People do not see mysteries in people they have not talked to/met. Why? Because there are lots of people they have not talked to. There is nothing mysterious in that. No, those people are delegated in her mind as part of the 'environment' or 'scenario' she is in. You only become real once you start interacting with her in some real way. The more values and time she gets from you, the more she will try to put you in a slot. If you are upwardly changing, she will be curious. "He is such a mystery!"
You want to be a mystery in this way rather than hiding your life (but no turning the girl into Oprah. That's just gross.) In this way, the more a person knows you, the more the person will see you as a mystery. This means your girl won't get bored. Her interest level will remain high.
And it will be through her doing! The word 'mystery' won't even go through your mind. She will think and ponder and create drama out of nothing (as women are quite good at doing). And the more she thinks about you, the more she will like you.
See? Don't try to force her mind into liking you. She wants to like you. By her finding reasons to like you as she tries to figure you out, she has convinced herself that you are worthy.
Previous Pook Index Next
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
Pook #48 - Why "Just Be Friends"
Let us interview the subjects...
The AFC, ala Mr. Nice Guy, comes walking in, crying and bubbling.
Pook shines the light in his eyes and walks around him in a circle.
Now, Mr. Nice Guy, why are you so sad?"
"Because... (sob), the girl I want only sees me as a friend!"
"What! How do you know?"
"Because I ask her out consistantly and she says, 'Let's Just Be Friends.'"
Poor Nice Guy! His heart is shattered and scattered across the floor! He wants to feel sorry for himself, wants others to feel sorry for himself, and hates how life has become.
But let us interrupt the Nice Guy's picking up his pieces of heart...
"Do say, Nice Guy, what you were trying to do?"
"Well (sob), I thought I could get close to this girl by being friends. I wanted to get close to her. Then, perhaps, something would happen."
This is very common. A hot woman has tons of guys trying to 'be friends' with her. But is it friendship?
Bring in the next subject!
Thus enters the hot woman herself. She sits down, Pook shines the light in her eyes, and walks around her with hands clasped behind his back.
Now woman! Why did you not go out with this guy?
"I just don't see him in that way? We're just friends."
But is it friends? Oh woman! Do tell, what does he remind you of really?
(she thinks) "I think of him like a brother."
Like a brother! In other words, the concept of sexuality referring to the Nice Guy she shudders in horror. Horror!
She thought of him like a brother because he acted like a brother. Going out of your way to do things for her (in a non-sexual/relationship context) is what her brother would do.
A woman must see you in a sexual way in order for any hope for romance to blossom (Wyldfire uses being 'worthy' to 'date'. Since women will never admit that they are wholly sexual beings, they just express it in that way.) The Nice Guy is going after the girl in some bizarre friendship way.
But let us complete the task. Bring in the Don Juan!
Don Juan enters and sits down, confidantly.
Don Juan, how can you be friends with girls and be successful where as the Nice Guy cannot?
"Pook, its all about fun. I have friends that are girls just because. I talk to them, hang out with them, have fun with them. The bitter truth is that the Nice Guy is not the Fun Guy. A woman won't date you unless she sees you in that way, in other words, she feels good around you,. translating to fun."
Indeed! Especially at the beginning, the best dates are action dates. Doing stuff rather than just talking or going to a movie or eating is more fun. The more fun she has, the more attractive you become.
When you have friends that are girls, in other words not romantically going after them, you are purely with them because of the fun. You enjoy spending time with them.
Alas, the more fun women have the more attracted they become. So eventually they turn their romantic target in your direction.
When the Nice Guy is 'friends', is he fun? Hardly. He tries to 'connect' to her in every possible way. He tries to 'get to know her' yet she is bored to hell (thus, she uses him as emotional tampon).
A girl will not consider dating a guy who bores her.
If there were any rule with women, I would say Never Bore Them. Make them laugh. Make them have fun. Heck, make them cry. Make them embarrassed. But never, NEVER bore them.
Also, there is the element of comfort. You'd be more likely to hang out with someone you know, right? The same is with women. A girl that feels comfortable with you will always be much more likely to be interested.
There is another reason why female friends may become interested. Sheer numbers.
Let’s have fun with this. Here’s another way to look at Success with Women, whereas the Success is defined as:
Success with Women
[(A x P)C+M] x W
A= Initial Appearance
P= Personality
C= Challenge
M= Mystery
W= Women
What are you high in? What needs working on?
Extroverted Nice Guys have more success then introverted Don Juans. When W equals zero, then no matter how awesome or attractive you are, your success rate equals zero. Improving quantity improves likelihood of results.
When you have female friends, the 'W' goes up and up.
When you become friends with a chick, it doesn't mean nothing can happen. Rather, when you see the chick (because she's hot or whatever) as fun itself and being around her is fun to you, that is when you go into LJBF.
Nice Guy has fun just being around a hot chick; the Don Juan has fun doing things with a hot chick. This is the difference.
Pook places the Nice Guy in front of him.
Admit it! You don't really care to go to the movies. You only did it so you'd be AROUND HER. ADMIT IT!
"IT'S TRUE! IT'S TRUE! Oh Pook, I am so ashamed! (boo hoo hoo)"
Pook then points to the Don Juan. "And YOU succeed because you pursue fun. She is along for the ride."
"Very true, Mr. Pook."
And remember, the Fun Guy not only gets the girl's TRUE friendship, but, eventually, her romantic interest as well.
---
QUOTE: "Just a dumb question guys.
I have liked a few girls who I never thought was attractive initially. But after becoming good friends, then I found them attractive and then asked them out....each time...I got LJBF'ed."
Once a girl sees you as a friend, you will always be a friend.
The only way 'out' of it is to use sexual tension. Stare at her eyes a bit longer. Start looking at her in 'that' way. Take your thought and send it to her through your eyes, face, and behavior.
Don't worry, she'll recieve it.
Based on her reaction, you'll know what to do.
You are thinking in a GIRLS FOR DATING vs. GIRLS FOR FRIENDS. Rather, try thinking in a NO SEXUAL TENSION vs. SEXUAL TENSION.
If you try to ask out a chick who you knew in a 'non sexuality' way, you will be LJBF. You need to bring in the sexuality.
She will notice something is *different*. She will think something is 'growing' between the two of you.
And she'll like it (if not, she won't send any *sexuality* back).
Previous Pook Index Next
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Related:
Pook #5: Lesson Two - Friendship Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Are you a slave? If so, you cannot be a friend. Are you a tyrant? If so, you cannot have friends. In woman, a slave and a tyrant have all too long been concealed. For that reason, woman is not yet capable of friendship: she knows only love. In a woman's love is injustice and blindness towards all that she does not love. And in the enlightened love of a woman, too, there is still the unexpected attack and lightning and night, along with the light. Woman is not yet capable of friendship: women are still cats and birds. Or, at best, cows. Woman is not yet capable of friendship. But tell me, you men, which of you is yet capable of friendship? -- Freiderich Neitzsche
The AFC, ala Mr. Nice Guy, comes walking in, crying and bubbling.
Pook shines the light in his eyes and walks around him in a circle.
Now, Mr. Nice Guy, why are you so sad?"
"Because... (sob), the girl I want only sees me as a friend!"
"What! How do you know?"
"Because I ask her out consistantly and she says, 'Let's Just Be Friends.'"
Poor Nice Guy! His heart is shattered and scattered across the floor! He wants to feel sorry for himself, wants others to feel sorry for himself, and hates how life has become.
But let us interrupt the Nice Guy's picking up his pieces of heart...
"Do say, Nice Guy, what you were trying to do?"
"Well (sob), I thought I could get close to this girl by being friends. I wanted to get close to her. Then, perhaps, something would happen."
This is very common. A hot woman has tons of guys trying to 'be friends' with her. But is it friendship?
Bring in the next subject!
Thus enters the hot woman herself. She sits down, Pook shines the light in her eyes, and walks around her with hands clasped behind his back.
Now woman! Why did you not go out with this guy?
"I just don't see him in that way? We're just friends."
But is it friends? Oh woman! Do tell, what does he remind you of really?
(she thinks) "I think of him like a brother."
Like a brother! In other words, the concept of sexuality referring to the Nice Guy she shudders in horror. Horror!
She thought of him like a brother because he acted like a brother. Going out of your way to do things for her (in a non-sexual/relationship context) is what her brother would do.
A woman must see you in a sexual way in order for any hope for romance to blossom (Wyldfire uses being 'worthy' to 'date'. Since women will never admit that they are wholly sexual beings, they just express it in that way.) The Nice Guy is going after the girl in some bizarre friendship way.
But let us complete the task. Bring in the Don Juan!
Don Juan enters and sits down, confidantly.
Don Juan, how can you be friends with girls and be successful where as the Nice Guy cannot?
"Pook, its all about fun. I have friends that are girls just because. I talk to them, hang out with them, have fun with them. The bitter truth is that the Nice Guy is not the Fun Guy. A woman won't date you unless she sees you in that way, in other words, she feels good around you,. translating to fun."
Indeed! Especially at the beginning, the best dates are action dates. Doing stuff rather than just talking or going to a movie or eating is more fun. The more fun she has, the more attractive you become.
When you have friends that are girls, in other words not romantically going after them, you are purely with them because of the fun. You enjoy spending time with them.
Alas, the more fun women have the more attracted they become. So eventually they turn their romantic target in your direction.
When the Nice Guy is 'friends', is he fun? Hardly. He tries to 'connect' to her in every possible way. He tries to 'get to know her' yet she is bored to hell (thus, she uses him as emotional tampon).
A girl will not consider dating a guy who bores her.
If there were any rule with women, I would say Never Bore Them. Make them laugh. Make them have fun. Heck, make them cry. Make them embarrassed. But never, NEVER bore them.
Also, there is the element of comfort. You'd be more likely to hang out with someone you know, right? The same is with women. A girl that feels comfortable with you will always be much more likely to be interested.
There is another reason why female friends may become interested. Sheer numbers.
Let’s have fun with this. Here’s another way to look at Success with Women, whereas the Success is defined as:
Success with Women
[(A x P)C+M] x W
A= Initial Appearance
P= Personality
C= Challenge
M= Mystery
W= Women
What are you high in? What needs working on?
Extroverted Nice Guys have more success then introverted Don Juans. When W equals zero, then no matter how awesome or attractive you are, your success rate equals zero. Improving quantity improves likelihood of results.
When you have female friends, the 'W' goes up and up.
When you become friends with a chick, it doesn't mean nothing can happen. Rather, when you see the chick (because she's hot or whatever) as fun itself and being around her is fun to you, that is when you go into LJBF.
Nice Guy has fun just being around a hot chick; the Don Juan has fun doing things with a hot chick. This is the difference.
Pook places the Nice Guy in front of him.
Admit it! You don't really care to go to the movies. You only did it so you'd be AROUND HER. ADMIT IT!
"IT'S TRUE! IT'S TRUE! Oh Pook, I am so ashamed! (boo hoo hoo)"
Pook then points to the Don Juan. "And YOU succeed because you pursue fun. She is along for the ride."
"Very true, Mr. Pook."
And remember, the Fun Guy not only gets the girl's TRUE friendship, but, eventually, her romantic interest as well.
---
QUOTE: "Just a dumb question guys.
I have liked a few girls who I never thought was attractive initially. But after becoming good friends, then I found them attractive and then asked them out....each time...I got LJBF'ed."
Once a girl sees you as a friend, you will always be a friend.
The only way 'out' of it is to use sexual tension. Stare at her eyes a bit longer. Start looking at her in 'that' way. Take your thought and send it to her through your eyes, face, and behavior.
Don't worry, she'll recieve it.
Based on her reaction, you'll know what to do.
You are thinking in a GIRLS FOR DATING vs. GIRLS FOR FRIENDS. Rather, try thinking in a NO SEXUAL TENSION vs. SEXUAL TENSION.
If you try to ask out a chick who you knew in a 'non sexuality' way, you will be LJBF. You need to bring in the sexuality.
She will notice something is *different*. She will think something is 'growing' between the two of you.
And she'll like it (if not, she won't send any *sexuality* back).
Previous Pook Index Next
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Related:
Pook #5: Lesson Two - Friendship Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Are you a slave? If so, you cannot be a friend. Are you a tyrant? If so, you cannot have friends. In woman, a slave and a tyrant have all too long been concealed. For that reason, woman is not yet capable of friendship: she knows only love. In a woman's love is injustice and blindness towards all that she does not love. And in the enlightened love of a woman, too, there is still the unexpected attack and lightning and night, along with the light. Woman is not yet capable of friendship: women are still cats and birds. Or, at best, cows. Woman is not yet capable of friendship. But tell me, you men, which of you is yet capable of friendship? -- Freiderich Neitzsche
Monday, August 16, 2004
Pook #47 - If Life Seems Hard and Unhappy, Read This!
Behold the lurker! After having been here for a while, the lurker may well exclaim:
"I was wrong to hope this website would make my love life easier. What a portrait of mankind! Here I was, only looking for easier ways to get laid. Now I am re-examining my entire life! I now think of things I never thought about and consider things I've never considered. The goal-posts keep moving further and further. This website has made life HARDER, not EASIER."
But the question is not whether your love life is harder or easier but whether it is true.
"Did he just say 'true'?"
Yes, he did. But nevertheless, let us get to the heart of the matter.
You say, "This website has made things harder. I now see things that I was blind too. Much work must be done."
However, you are not pained by this. Rather, this is the source of your melancholy:
"I see others who consider nothing, do not consult their dreams, and so end up in a life of bliss."
Oh, pernicious website! Are Don Juans now villians, only to whisper evils into your head? Why does it seem things have become harder and more painful?
You have two paths in love and life.
1) Live your dreams.
2) Live other people's dreams.
So far, every article, every technique, every tip, is poured to flow through the filter of satisfying women and getting women to like you. I can sum up most, if not all, of these 'how to get women' advice with three words:
QUOTE: "Dump your dreams."
Take your typical guy. Which does he fear more? Is it 'being dumped by the girl he likes,' OR is it 'dumping his dreams'?
You protest, "It is not so cut and dry! A relationship involves some compromise."
And while that is true, young men are doing everything they can to avoid that they aren't being true. No, you cannot expect to get your way with everything and life. And no, you don't expect a girl to drop her dreams solely for yours. The entire idea is not to like the same hobbies and think each other is hot. No, it is to be going the same way in life.
"You can have your dreams and the girl too."
But only by embracing your dreams first and the girl second. If you embrace the girl first, you may be allowed to live out certain dreams or not, depending on her choice. This is why I say it is not a question of whether your love life has become HARD or EASY, but rather if it has become TRUE or FALSE. False Love and False Life is living someone else's dreams. This may make some happy (especially for those who do not, or will not, dream). Others become more melancholy and the rest will lie to themselves. ("But Pook, how do guys get caught up in this?" Because they place the dream on the girl, so she becomes his 'dream-girl'. This is how he convinces himself he is getting both the dream and the girl.)
Two paths in love and life. Live your dreams or live other people's dreams. One path is HARD. The other path is EASY. One path leads to SECURITY. The other path leads to FREEDOM.
Permit me, for this paragraph, to use the analogy of money to love and life. We know how rich people live and what they drive. And let us assume, for this paragraph, that all people want what the rich have. There are two ways (in this paragraph at least) to obtain it. One is to buy the super cool car, big house, and everything else on bad debt. The other way is to obtain the assets and wealth to actually buy them. One way is EASY. The other way is HARD. One way requires little to no risk. The other takes a lot of risk (obtaining wealth and assets takes courage to go out and create. Bad debt does not). By going into bad debt, you end up literally working for those who lent you the money. And you know what? The world encourages you to get into bad debt. You can easily get a loan on a house you cannot pay off within 30 years. And look in your mailbox. Is that another pre-approved credit card? It's the third one this week. There are lots of people who 'look rich' but they are in major debt. I ask you, 'Are they free?' They will be working for the bank and car companies to repay the debt with most of the days from their life.
In the same way, young men do the same for women. They look 'rich' because they have the women and can enjoy them, but what was the price they had to pay for it? Whose dreams are they following? And because of that choice, who is he working for? Both the seducer and nice guy work for the women's dreams as they seem to have none of their own. It is the price for security. And just like bad debt, the world seems to want you to take this EASY path. Movies exemplify this thing called 'love' that you must sacrifice your dreams to. Pop songs are modern prayers to the Woman Goddess, to satisfy her and your addiction to female praise (which, today, we label as male 'love'.)
Let me show a chart to illustrate the point.
Pook drags a display up onto the stage.
Turn on the light, please. Thank you. This, gentlemen, is what I call the Security Path, the easy path that is default in 90% of young males:
QUOTE: Time Difference in the Security Path
Current
Girl: Has girlfriend, multiple girlfriends.
Friends: Hang out with old buddies.
Job: OK job. Steady paycheck. Pays the bills.
Family: Loves you.
Later
Girl: No girl or same old girl.
Friends: Same friends.
Job: Same or similar job. Promoted perhaps.
Family: Loves you.
---
Pook hits the chart with his pointy stick.
In both current and later states, his family and friends are pleased with him. After all, he has a girl. He has his buds. He has a steady job that more than provides. And his family loves him. After all, he repeated exactly what his Dad did. So what more could he want?
Now scroll your eyes over to the 'later' side. He will one day wake up and realize he is now 'average' in life. He has not grown at all during the time difference. He is what he was with just an aged rotting body. Where is the dream?
All right guys, bring out the next chart.
QUOTE: Time Difference in the Freedom Path
Current
Girl: No girl.
Friends: Left many
behind.
Job: Transitional.
Sometimes jobless.
Family: Thinks he
will become loser.
Later
Girl: Has girl (or girls) who likes his life and him. (Life gets richer because
she is with him because of the dreams he embraced, not to be a mere workhorse.)
Friends: New friends. (Often smarter, cooler, better people).
Job: Got the job or made the business/investments he always wanted.
Family: Often despises him for his success.
---
Pook tapped with his pointy stick.
Here, he seems like a loser currently. Yet, he wins in the end. It is painful and hard to not go for the nearest girl but rather for the girl who likes what you like. (Note: why is so much attention on obtaining the girl but neglecting ourselves? The answer should be obvious.)
Look at his friends! He had to leave them behind. It is painful for sure. But he made new friends which helped develop himself into a better character.
Oh, and there is the job. He was transitional. He was trying out different jobs. He was starting businesses. He was making mistakes. The Security Path is scared of making mistakes. In fact, the Security Path praises itself because it is mistake-free! But in the end, the Freedom Path gets to work in his job of choice.
What I find particularly noteworthy is how there is the frustration that starts early in the Freedom Path, it vanishes over time. However, in the Security Path, the initial pain is not there but accumulates over time. The poor soul either suffers or lies to himself: i.e. "I have done the honorable path." But you did not honor your dream and so committed treason against your Gift.
This, I said to myself, is what the initial young man, who found this website to be creating more pain and frustration in his life, apparently did not understand.
Perhaps we should remember the analogy of a medicine shot. The shot is initially painful, as was the shock of many of the things you've learned here. Taking action and embracing your dreams, rather than 'securities', is initially hard but it gets easier in the same way the shot is painful but soothes over time. Those who did not take the shot ran into disease later in life. For those that did, each day gets more wonderful and brighter, rather than more melancholy and darker.
Here is another parable. A young man was mad that his current days of life were frustrating and hard. "Rotten Nature!" he raged and shook his fist at the sky. "How unfair you are!" But Nature replied, "Foolish youth! This 'pain' and 'frustration' is merely my discipline. As you know, you cannot take joy in this pain. But know that those who humble themselves to the ways of life will find the discipline cease as you learn my ways and the fruits of life shall become available. Until you learn your lessons, I will continue to deliver discipline."
And perhaps the scared young men in particular, whose hearts are dazzled by the securities that women supposedly 'bring them', will consider life from this side of the question.
Perhaps they will say to themselves: "The origin of my dream-girl was to place my dream onto her. Thank heavens I was saved from such shackles! Now I know to embrace my dream, and to those girls who love that choice, they cease to be the girl of my dreams but the girl in my dreams.”
So what hope is there for the average guy? "Don't be average."
And how do you do this? "By doing what average guys don't do."
Which is? "Embracing the dreams first, the girls second."
One strange phenomenon I've noticed among those of the Security Path is that, yes, they construct a 'dream-girl' and marry her. Talk to the gentleman and ask about his wife. He will paint the most wondrous praise and glory of his wife, with such animation and passion, even (especially in this case) if she is a fat hag!
Your wife ought to be praised but such infinitude and animation belongs to your dreams, not to a particular female. Do not make the Dante mistake and turn your Beatrice into a gigantic heavenly body.
The difference is so clear and precise. Those on the Security Path submit life to love. Those on the Freedom Path submit love to life. The Security Path reaches only for love. But those on the Freedom Path reach for life first and end up with both life and love. One projects the dreams onto the girl. The other invites the girl into his dreams.
Previous Pook Index Next
"I was wrong to hope this website would make my love life easier. What a portrait of mankind! Here I was, only looking for easier ways to get laid. Now I am re-examining my entire life! I now think of things I never thought about and consider things I've never considered. The goal-posts keep moving further and further. This website has made life HARDER, not EASIER."
But the question is not whether your love life is harder or easier but whether it is true.
"Did he just say 'true'?"
Yes, he did. But nevertheless, let us get to the heart of the matter.
You say, "This website has made things harder. I now see things that I was blind too. Much work must be done."
However, you are not pained by this. Rather, this is the source of your melancholy:
"I see others who consider nothing, do not consult their dreams, and so end up in a life of bliss."
Oh, pernicious website! Are Don Juans now villians, only to whisper evils into your head? Why does it seem things have become harder and more painful?
You have two paths in love and life.
1) Live your dreams.
2) Live other people's dreams.
So far, every article, every technique, every tip, is poured to flow through the filter of satisfying women and getting women to like you. I can sum up most, if not all, of these 'how to get women' advice with three words:
QUOTE: "Dump your dreams."
Take your typical guy. Which does he fear more? Is it 'being dumped by the girl he likes,' OR is it 'dumping his dreams'?
You protest, "It is not so cut and dry! A relationship involves some compromise."
And while that is true, young men are doing everything they can to avoid that they aren't being true. No, you cannot expect to get your way with everything and life. And no, you don't expect a girl to drop her dreams solely for yours. The entire idea is not to like the same hobbies and think each other is hot. No, it is to be going the same way in life.
"You can have your dreams and the girl too."
But only by embracing your dreams first and the girl second. If you embrace the girl first, you may be allowed to live out certain dreams or not, depending on her choice. This is why I say it is not a question of whether your love life has become HARD or EASY, but rather if it has become TRUE or FALSE. False Love and False Life is living someone else's dreams. This may make some happy (especially for those who do not, or will not, dream). Others become more melancholy and the rest will lie to themselves. ("But Pook, how do guys get caught up in this?" Because they place the dream on the girl, so she becomes his 'dream-girl'. This is how he convinces himself he is getting both the dream and the girl.)
Two paths in love and life. Live your dreams or live other people's dreams. One path is HARD. The other path is EASY. One path leads to SECURITY. The other path leads to FREEDOM.
Permit me, for this paragraph, to use the analogy of money to love and life. We know how rich people live and what they drive. And let us assume, for this paragraph, that all people want what the rich have. There are two ways (in this paragraph at least) to obtain it. One is to buy the super cool car, big house, and everything else on bad debt. The other way is to obtain the assets and wealth to actually buy them. One way is EASY. The other way is HARD. One way requires little to no risk. The other takes a lot of risk (obtaining wealth and assets takes courage to go out and create. Bad debt does not). By going into bad debt, you end up literally working for those who lent you the money. And you know what? The world encourages you to get into bad debt. You can easily get a loan on a house you cannot pay off within 30 years. And look in your mailbox. Is that another pre-approved credit card? It's the third one this week. There are lots of people who 'look rich' but they are in major debt. I ask you, 'Are they free?' They will be working for the bank and car companies to repay the debt with most of the days from their life.
In the same way, young men do the same for women. They look 'rich' because they have the women and can enjoy them, but what was the price they had to pay for it? Whose dreams are they following? And because of that choice, who is he working for? Both the seducer and nice guy work for the women's dreams as they seem to have none of their own. It is the price for security. And just like bad debt, the world seems to want you to take this EASY path. Movies exemplify this thing called 'love' that you must sacrifice your dreams to. Pop songs are modern prayers to the Woman Goddess, to satisfy her and your addiction to female praise (which, today, we label as male 'love'.)
Let me show a chart to illustrate the point.
Pook drags a display up onto the stage.
Turn on the light, please. Thank you. This, gentlemen, is what I call the Security Path, the easy path that is default in 90% of young males:
QUOTE: Time Difference in the Security Path
Current
Girl: Has girlfriend, multiple girlfriends.
Friends: Hang out with old buddies.
Job: OK job. Steady paycheck. Pays the bills.
Family: Loves you.
Later
Girl: No girl or same old girl.
Friends: Same friends.
Job: Same or similar job. Promoted perhaps.
Family: Loves you.
---
Pook hits the chart with his pointy stick.
In both current and later states, his family and friends are pleased with him. After all, he has a girl. He has his buds. He has a steady job that more than provides. And his family loves him. After all, he repeated exactly what his Dad did. So what more could he want?
Now scroll your eyes over to the 'later' side. He will one day wake up and realize he is now 'average' in life. He has not grown at all during the time difference. He is what he was with just an aged rotting body. Where is the dream?
All right guys, bring out the next chart.
QUOTE: Time Difference in the Freedom Path
Current
Girl: No girl.
Friends: Left many
behind.
Job: Transitional.
Sometimes jobless.
Family: Thinks he
will become loser.
Later
Girl: Has girl (or girls) who likes his life and him. (Life gets richer because
she is with him because of the dreams he embraced, not to be a mere workhorse.)
Friends: New friends. (Often smarter, cooler, better people).
Job: Got the job or made the business/investments he always wanted.
Family: Often despises him for his success.
---
Pook tapped with his pointy stick.
Here, he seems like a loser currently. Yet, he wins in the end. It is painful and hard to not go for the nearest girl but rather for the girl who likes what you like. (Note: why is so much attention on obtaining the girl but neglecting ourselves? The answer should be obvious.)
Look at his friends! He had to leave them behind. It is painful for sure. But he made new friends which helped develop himself into a better character.
Oh, and there is the job. He was transitional. He was trying out different jobs. He was starting businesses. He was making mistakes. The Security Path is scared of making mistakes. In fact, the Security Path praises itself because it is mistake-free! But in the end, the Freedom Path gets to work in his job of choice.
What I find particularly noteworthy is how there is the frustration that starts early in the Freedom Path, it vanishes over time. However, in the Security Path, the initial pain is not there but accumulates over time. The poor soul either suffers or lies to himself: i.e. "I have done the honorable path." But you did not honor your dream and so committed treason against your Gift.
This, I said to myself, is what the initial young man, who found this website to be creating more pain and frustration in his life, apparently did not understand.
Perhaps we should remember the analogy of a medicine shot. The shot is initially painful, as was the shock of many of the things you've learned here. Taking action and embracing your dreams, rather than 'securities', is initially hard but it gets easier in the same way the shot is painful but soothes over time. Those who did not take the shot ran into disease later in life. For those that did, each day gets more wonderful and brighter, rather than more melancholy and darker.
Here is another parable. A young man was mad that his current days of life were frustrating and hard. "Rotten Nature!" he raged and shook his fist at the sky. "How unfair you are!" But Nature replied, "Foolish youth! This 'pain' and 'frustration' is merely my discipline. As you know, you cannot take joy in this pain. But know that those who humble themselves to the ways of life will find the discipline cease as you learn my ways and the fruits of life shall become available. Until you learn your lessons, I will continue to deliver discipline."
And perhaps the scared young men in particular, whose hearts are dazzled by the securities that women supposedly 'bring them', will consider life from this side of the question.
Perhaps they will say to themselves: "The origin of my dream-girl was to place my dream onto her. Thank heavens I was saved from such shackles! Now I know to embrace my dream, and to those girls who love that choice, they cease to be the girl of my dreams but the girl in my dreams.”
So what hope is there for the average guy? "Don't be average."
And how do you do this? "By doing what average guys don't do."
Which is? "Embracing the dreams first, the girls second."
One strange phenomenon I've noticed among those of the Security Path is that, yes, they construct a 'dream-girl' and marry her. Talk to the gentleman and ask about his wife. He will paint the most wondrous praise and glory of his wife, with such animation and passion, even (especially in this case) if she is a fat hag!
Your wife ought to be praised but such infinitude and animation belongs to your dreams, not to a particular female. Do not make the Dante mistake and turn your Beatrice into a gigantic heavenly body.
The difference is so clear and precise. Those on the Security Path submit life to love. Those on the Freedom Path submit love to life. The Security Path reaches only for love. But those on the Freedom Path reach for life first and end up with both life and love. One projects the dreams onto the girl. The other invites the girl into his dreams.
Previous Pook Index Next
Sunday, August 15, 2004
Pook #46 - Habit is All
The reason for my success is habit. A Don Juan is a sum of correct habits.
This pales to other ideas. Some think message boards contain magic which will instantly turn one into a Don Juan. Others think special spirits will jump out of the DJ Bible and blossom you to a Don Juan. But this is poppycock!
"'Poppycock!?' Pook says?" Yes, poppycock. Even if you had every mental formula and idea ingrained in your head, you still won't be successful with women or anything.
Look at you! A plop of flesh sitting in a chair! How do you get from there to with the chicks?
"I will take a deep breath, go out with all confidence, and get the chick!"
This is blitzkrieg. It might work but you're still a loose cannon. Confidence is comfortableness. Don't try to force yourself to something that seems entirely alien to you. You'll never be comfortable with it.
Alter your habits and so you alter your life. Make it a HABIT to talk to girls. Make it a HABIT to be social. Make it a HABIT to look for dates. Make it a HABIT to date! Make it a HABIT to Don Juan!
"But Pook! These will require an initial icebreaker." Yes. But that should not be where you place the 'challenge' at. Focus on being consistant. Sure, you can create a huge mental drama about approaching that hot chick. But you should focus on being consistant in approaching hot chicks in general. This one chick is nothing in your string of routine.
Think of it like that.
Women are not Ice Water
"He who hesitates, masturbates" we hear. Or we might hear, "Imagine yourself old and dreaming of what you could have done. Go out today or die!" Some people even do affirmations to get them to 'approach'.
But approaching is not a disconnected thing in itself. Talking to women should NOT be like plunging into ice water. You whirl a slogan in your head and you go 'bliztkrieg' on her. Rather, women should be seen as WARM water, something you EASE into pleasantly. There's no need to cannonball into them.
It's similiar to working out. Habit is the key to success in working out, without it nothing else matters. A guy doing THE BEST WORKOUTS in perfect form and intensity only a few times is INFERIOR to the guy who does CRAPPY WORKOUTS and is consistant with them.
You are not the smoothest guy with the ladies. You know what? Neither am I. However, you have an advantage over the smooth guys: you are more consistant. Hey, they might go for a girl only once a month. You, however, will be going for them FAR MORE often. In the end, you will become 'smooth' while even the smoothest guy gets rusty.
What are you doing now? Surfing the Internet? Do you do this everyday? Do you enter your little hyper-reality of video games and mental riddles?
How do you break from this cycle? By changing your habits. If you can change your habits, you WILL change your life. Your habits are your prophecy. Endure and keep those habits, and your life will change just as simply as turning a dial to 'overdrive'. It's that simple.
So instead of focusing on asking out the chick or talking to the chick, focus on the continuity of it. She will then become just one chick in your routine. You focus on the routine, on the consistency, not on the chick.
Where will you be five years from now?
Hopefully, you will not still be on this site reading posts. Here is a story I enjoy and wish to share with you:
At the age of 22, he worked for his father at a bakery. He was married and had a kid on the way. Because of these rising costs, he asked for a raise. His father didn't give it to him.
So he walked away from the bakery with only twenty two dollars in his pocket and a wife with a child on the way. He started a sandwhich business that became popular as he went around to construction sites. Eventually, he entered the construction company and became one of the largest constructing companies in California. He would eventually buy a football team and watch them win the Superbowl.
Who is this guy? Alex Spanos. How did he get there from here? He says, "Habit." He detailed what he wanted to do with his life in five years. He slowly worked toward those goals and he met them every time. In fact, he would meet them BEFORE reaching the five year mark.
Compare this with other guys. Many have dreams, few have goals. By putting a TIME LIMIT on what you want to do, you often set yourself to achieve it.
"Then in five years I want all the chicks to be wanting me!" It doesn't have to be five years. It could be two months. And you can't place your success on OTHER people. You can say that you want to gain/lose weight, get your life together, get that job you've been wanting, become more social, whatever. You CANNOT say, "I'm going to have a girlfriend in X amount of time." That depends on someone else. Rather, say, "I'm going to get in the ROUTINE of talking to chicks, asking them out, and being more social." The goal then becomes a prophecy.
Focus on the Habit
Aristotle says, "We are the sum of our habits" and this is true. I've talked to A LOT of guys on being successful with women. One thing that seperates them from other guys is that they focused on the HABIT, not on the girl or the procedure. They told themselves, "I will ask out 20 girls this week". In almost every case, they do not get to 20 because they end up getting a girlfriend after the first few. It is THAT simple.
Behind every Don Juan is a series of correct habits (which are detailed throughout this site). Consistency with everything is crucial. For Habit is the child of Mindset, and this is how as you think you shall become.
Previous Pook Index Next
This pales to other ideas. Some think message boards contain magic which will instantly turn one into a Don Juan. Others think special spirits will jump out of the DJ Bible and blossom you to a Don Juan. But this is poppycock!
"'Poppycock!?' Pook says?" Yes, poppycock. Even if you had every mental formula and idea ingrained in your head, you still won't be successful with women or anything.
Look at you! A plop of flesh sitting in a chair! How do you get from there to with the chicks?
"I will take a deep breath, go out with all confidence, and get the chick!"
This is blitzkrieg. It might work but you're still a loose cannon. Confidence is comfortableness. Don't try to force yourself to something that seems entirely alien to you. You'll never be comfortable with it.
Alter your habits and so you alter your life. Make it a HABIT to talk to girls. Make it a HABIT to be social. Make it a HABIT to look for dates. Make it a HABIT to date! Make it a HABIT to Don Juan!
"But Pook! These will require an initial icebreaker." Yes. But that should not be where you place the 'challenge' at. Focus on being consistant. Sure, you can create a huge mental drama about approaching that hot chick. But you should focus on being consistant in approaching hot chicks in general. This one chick is nothing in your string of routine.
Think of it like that.
Women are not Ice Water
"He who hesitates, masturbates" we hear. Or we might hear, "Imagine yourself old and dreaming of what you could have done. Go out today or die!" Some people even do affirmations to get them to 'approach'.
But approaching is not a disconnected thing in itself. Talking to women should NOT be like plunging into ice water. You whirl a slogan in your head and you go 'bliztkrieg' on her. Rather, women should be seen as WARM water, something you EASE into pleasantly. There's no need to cannonball into them.
It's similiar to working out. Habit is the key to success in working out, without it nothing else matters. A guy doing THE BEST WORKOUTS in perfect form and intensity only a few times is INFERIOR to the guy who does CRAPPY WORKOUTS and is consistant with them.
You are not the smoothest guy with the ladies. You know what? Neither am I. However, you have an advantage over the smooth guys: you are more consistant. Hey, they might go for a girl only once a month. You, however, will be going for them FAR MORE often. In the end, you will become 'smooth' while even the smoothest guy gets rusty.
What are you doing now? Surfing the Internet? Do you do this everyday? Do you enter your little hyper-reality of video games and mental riddles?
How do you break from this cycle? By changing your habits. If you can change your habits, you WILL change your life. Your habits are your prophecy. Endure and keep those habits, and your life will change just as simply as turning a dial to 'overdrive'. It's that simple.
So instead of focusing on asking out the chick or talking to the chick, focus on the continuity of it. She will then become just one chick in your routine. You focus on the routine, on the consistency, not on the chick.
Where will you be five years from now?
Hopefully, you will not still be on this site reading posts. Here is a story I enjoy and wish to share with you:
At the age of 22, he worked for his father at a bakery. He was married and had a kid on the way. Because of these rising costs, he asked for a raise. His father didn't give it to him.
So he walked away from the bakery with only twenty two dollars in his pocket and a wife with a child on the way. He started a sandwhich business that became popular as he went around to construction sites. Eventually, he entered the construction company and became one of the largest constructing companies in California. He would eventually buy a football team and watch them win the Superbowl.
Who is this guy? Alex Spanos. How did he get there from here? He says, "Habit." He detailed what he wanted to do with his life in five years. He slowly worked toward those goals and he met them every time. In fact, he would meet them BEFORE reaching the five year mark.
Compare this with other guys. Many have dreams, few have goals. By putting a TIME LIMIT on what you want to do, you often set yourself to achieve it.
"Then in five years I want all the chicks to be wanting me!" It doesn't have to be five years. It could be two months. And you can't place your success on OTHER people. You can say that you want to gain/lose weight, get your life together, get that job you've been wanting, become more social, whatever. You CANNOT say, "I'm going to have a girlfriend in X amount of time." That depends on someone else. Rather, say, "I'm going to get in the ROUTINE of talking to chicks, asking them out, and being more social." The goal then becomes a prophecy.
Focus on the Habit
Aristotle says, "We are the sum of our habits" and this is true. I've talked to A LOT of guys on being successful with women. One thing that seperates them from other guys is that they focused on the HABIT, not on the girl or the procedure. They told themselves, "I will ask out 20 girls this week". In almost every case, they do not get to 20 because they end up getting a girlfriend after the first few. It is THAT simple.
Behind every Don Juan is a series of correct habits (which are detailed throughout this site). Consistency with everything is crucial. For Habit is the child of Mindset, and this is how as you think you shall become.
Previous Pook Index Next
Saturday, August 14, 2004
Pook #45 - Attention Whores
BGMan wrote:
People who read and actually believe what Crowes wrote WILL be strung around and used by ATTENTION WH0RES unless you wake up!
Yes, it does appear there are 'attention *****s' who do all they can to get male attention. But I prefer to think of them as loving the sport rather than the fruits of the sport. They enjoy fishing but not the caught fish!
Women do become more attached to guys who take their virginity and often return to them. But what crowes says is quite correct.
Guys, please read the following until it gets ingrained in your head:
Pook hops up to the platform and shouts:
QUOTE: "Women do not know the difference between sex and respect. Women treat sex like money because women see it as a medium of exchange."
You could even cynically say that we men treat respect and money like sex since we expect it to get pregnant and reproduce. But nevertheless...
But what is the point? It is this: if we are going to talk about a woman's integrity then we are going to be here forever.
As much as I can see, the only reason why the lady has what we think of as 'integrity' is for her to keep her man, to honor her parents (the father especially) or because of the male virtues ingrained through religion. Remember, women do not have the appreciation for the higher codes of honor and transcendence as we men do (they only appreciate it in MALES, never in themselves).
BGMan, you decry the attention *****. But feminity is exactly that.
What is it that women most fear? It is to be the old maid. It is to never know the fleeting emotion known as 'love'. It is to never have known a lover.
Pook holds up a Tablet.
On THIS tablet we see the Male Virtues. We see things like Philosophy, Honor, and so forth. We see things like chasity in women, girls staying true to a single guy, and so on.
Pook now holds up another Tablet.
These are the Female Virtues. In Womaniverse, women perform a natural aristocracy based solely on who gets the most attention from men.
Pook points to the top.
The highest point is marriage. The married chick is always on a higher plane than any non-marriage chick in this aristocracy. She has a man bounded by her. Thus, she is womanly, she is feminine.
While men dream of a day when having respect from all people in the world, women dream of their marriage day. Why? Because it is their transcendance.
Pook points lower on the Tablet.
We move down further and we see a pattern. The woman engaged comes next. Than, a woman who has a boyfriend. After that, a woman who is pretty and has potential for getting a male.
Pook points to the bottom of the Tablet.
The woman that can get no male, why, she is looked down upon as other woman and seen as a sub-human being. In a woman's eye, it is better to be a ***** than an old maid.
Pook holds up the Female Tablet.
What are we to learn of Womanly Virtues? Nothing. They are decadent. Men can rank themselves on who can best conquer the world while women will rank themselves on who does and can best conquer men.
Male attention! These are the points to their feminine score! They are all, all attention *****s on some level!
You may think that there are only some women who seek male attention, the attention wh0res, while the rest are good. This is a Nice Guy illusion (just as some women want sex while others are 'good' where, in fact, they all want it ESPECIALLY the 'Nice Girls'). ALL women crave male attention. Period!
Of course a woman like that may possibly leave you for another guy. The point is that these attention 'wh0res' are following the Female Tablet's virtues. They will realize that if they want a decent man, they must start following the Male Tablet.
Pook throws the Female Tablet down in an explosion of fire.
Rather than trying to figure out woman (how can you figure out 'nothing'? As King Lear would say: "Nothing comes from nothing!"), let us take up this...
Pook holds up the Male Tablet.
And let us be Men once again.
Previous Pook Index Next
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Related: Zenpriest #5 - Addicted to Attention
People who read and actually believe what Crowes wrote WILL be strung around and used by ATTENTION WH0RES unless you wake up!
Yes, it does appear there are 'attention *****s' who do all they can to get male attention. But I prefer to think of them as loving the sport rather than the fruits of the sport. They enjoy fishing but not the caught fish!
Women do become more attached to guys who take their virginity and often return to them. But what crowes says is quite correct.
Guys, please read the following until it gets ingrained in your head:
Pook hops up to the platform and shouts:
QUOTE: "Women do not know the difference between sex and respect. Women treat sex like money because women see it as a medium of exchange."
You could even cynically say that we men treat respect and money like sex since we expect it to get pregnant and reproduce. But nevertheless...
But what is the point? It is this: if we are going to talk about a woman's integrity then we are going to be here forever.
As much as I can see, the only reason why the lady has what we think of as 'integrity' is for her to keep her man, to honor her parents (the father especially) or because of the male virtues ingrained through religion. Remember, women do not have the appreciation for the higher codes of honor and transcendence as we men do (they only appreciate it in MALES, never in themselves).
BGMan, you decry the attention *****. But feminity is exactly that.
What is it that women most fear? It is to be the old maid. It is to never know the fleeting emotion known as 'love'. It is to never have known a lover.
Pook holds up a Tablet.
On THIS tablet we see the Male Virtues. We see things like Philosophy, Honor, and so forth. We see things like chasity in women, girls staying true to a single guy, and so on.
Pook now holds up another Tablet.
These are the Female Virtues. In Womaniverse, women perform a natural aristocracy based solely on who gets the most attention from men.
Pook points to the top.
The highest point is marriage. The married chick is always on a higher plane than any non-marriage chick in this aristocracy. She has a man bounded by her. Thus, she is womanly, she is feminine.
While men dream of a day when having respect from all people in the world, women dream of their marriage day. Why? Because it is their transcendance.
Pook points lower on the Tablet.
We move down further and we see a pattern. The woman engaged comes next. Than, a woman who has a boyfriend. After that, a woman who is pretty and has potential for getting a male.
Pook points to the bottom of the Tablet.
The woman that can get no male, why, she is looked down upon as other woman and seen as a sub-human being. In a woman's eye, it is better to be a ***** than an old maid.
Pook holds up the Female Tablet.
What are we to learn of Womanly Virtues? Nothing. They are decadent. Men can rank themselves on who can best conquer the world while women will rank themselves on who does and can best conquer men.
Male attention! These are the points to their feminine score! They are all, all attention *****s on some level!
You may think that there are only some women who seek male attention, the attention wh0res, while the rest are good. This is a Nice Guy illusion (just as some women want sex while others are 'good' where, in fact, they all want it ESPECIALLY the 'Nice Girls'). ALL women crave male attention. Period!
Of course a woman like that may possibly leave you for another guy. The point is that these attention 'wh0res' are following the Female Tablet's virtues. They will realize that if they want a decent man, they must start following the Male Tablet.
Pook throws the Female Tablet down in an explosion of fire.
Rather than trying to figure out woman (how can you figure out 'nothing'? As King Lear would say: "Nothing comes from nothing!"), let us take up this...
Pook holds up the Male Tablet.
And let us be Men once again.
Previous Pook Index Next
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Related: Zenpriest #5 - Addicted to Attention
Friday, August 13, 2004
Pook #44 - Good Girls Do Cheat
Oh! So much to comment on in this thread!
Deep Dish Congrats on pointing out the Dracula metaphor. There was a Native American myth of women who had teethed vaginas in such the male does not exit the same as he entered. The Dracula metaphor is found in almost all mythologies in the world.
Here is a passage from the Book of Proverbs. This 'book' is intended to be advice for YOUNG MEN. What does it speak of? Why, the same questions that are on this thread. It emphasis heavily that WISDOM is more important than any silver. It advises that one avoids these women and gives a beautiful description of the wife a young man should aim for.
QUOTE:
7:6. For I looked out of the window of my house through the lattice,
7:7. And I see little ones, I behold a foolish young man,
7:8. Who passeth through the street by the corner, and goeth nigh the way of her house,
7:9. In the dark when it grows late, in the darkness and obscurity of the night.
7:10. And behold a woman meeteth him in harlot’s attire, prepared to deceive souls: talkative and wandering,
7:11. Not bearing to be quiet, not able to abide still at home,
7:12. Now abroad, now in the streets, now lying in wait near the corners.
Already we see the ANCIENT description of women being BORED and very decieving.
QUOTE:
7:13. And catching the young man, she kisseth him, and with an impudent face, flattereth, saying:
7:14. I vowed victims for prosperity, this day I have paid my vows.
7:15. Therefore I am come out to meet thee, desirous to see thee, and I have found thee.
7:16. I have woven my bed with cords, I have covered it with painted tapestry, brought from Egypt.
7:17. I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.
7:18. Come, let us be inebriated with the breasts, and let us enjoy the desired embraces, till the day appear.
7:19. For my husband is not at home, he is gone a very long journey.
The husband is gone! The woman is married! She is not single and literally devouring the young foolish male.
QUOTE:
7:20. He took with him a bag of money: he will return home the day of the full moon.
7:21. She entangled him with many words, and drew him away with the flattery of her lips.
7:22. Immediately he followeth her as an ox led to the slaughter and as a lamb playing the wanton, and not knowing that he is drawn like a fool to bonds,
7:23. Till the arrow pierce his liver: as if a bird should make haste to the snare, and knoweth not that his life is in danger.
His life is in danger! Why is this ancient tome of wisdom saying such a thing?
"It is speaking of spiritual life, of his soul."
Yes but no! Just look around for validation. I see a fleet of young men, obviously gone the path that above foolish male did, and have their lives sucked from them. They lose their ambition. They just sit about, drowning in sensuality. They have become merely boy-toys. There is no Man in them.
QUOTE:
7:24. Now, therefore, my son, hear me, and attend to the words of my mouth.
7:25. Let not thy mind be drawn away in her ways: neither be thou deceived with her paths.
7:26. For she hath cast down many wounded, and the strongest have been slain by her.
7:27. Her house is the way to hell, reaching even to the inner chambers of death.
This is quite a condemning piece on these type of women. But the advice is sound.
If the foolish young man could speak, he would say, "Look at me! Look at me! I have sexed a married woman! Wow, that means I am really special! I have such sKilZ! I am SO AWESOME that I am bedding MARRIED WOMEN!"
The foolish youth is filled with vanity. He does not see that the woman is merely using and discarding him. It is like the guy who thinks the girl he is dating 'really really likes him'. In truth, she is just bored on Saturday night and going out is better than being at home.
All this talk of 'sexual revolution', of female 'independence' is a load of BS. As we can see, women have always acted this way. If there has been any 'sexual revolution', it has been in the decreased IGNORANCE of sexuality. There are less and less men and ladies as time goes by.
Rather than looking at things in a 'bad girl' or 'good girl' frame, it might be more helpful to look at it in a 'GIVING' or 'NONGIVING' frame.
For example, the 'NONGIVING' girl only sees you as a prop, as a boytoy, as an ATM card. This type of girl is all about HER, of what SHE can get for HERSELF. As a mother, she sees her children as merely agents to give her 'motherly feelings'. She doesn't truly GIVE her life for them or for the husband.
The GIVING girl tends to be the sweet one. She sees children not as a bangle to give her more status to this world or 'motherly feelings', but as someone to sacrifice and invest her life within. She even has that attitude towards you. She is the ideal wife and mother.
Rather than 'good' or 'bad' girl, I think the 'giving' and 'nongiving' frame is more illuminating.
bp1947 I really liked your post:
QUOTE: "A man can't commit to a set of female genitals, only to a whole woman who knows how to act like a woman and how to make her man feel like a man."
Exactly! Sexuality has been so perverted to think anything with the genitals. It involves the entire body...mind... and soul.
QUOTE: "Women want their man to make them feel like a woman, well it works both ways. Most women nowadays offer little more than regular sex, and when sex is so easily offered why should any of us guys bother to commit?"
I keep reading newstories (a trend) of young men shrugging off marriage, like Atlas shrugging off the world. The distinction is excellent. Rather than seeing women as just female genitals with their breasts, butt, etc. being merely genital ornamentation, men do want to marry only REAL women.
But with EVERY woman I come across, they ALL say, "I understand men" (you won't find a male who will say such a thing about women with any real confidence). They think they know how to CONTROL men, how to make 'men happy'. But they are SO VAIN and SO WRONG it is laughable.
All we 'learn' on sexuality nowadays are stale evolution theories, bogus psychologies, and bumper sticker political statements. There is no real knowledge on sexuality these days. There is no emphasis on girls to become ladies or boys to become men.
It's time for the world to have a TRUE Sexual Revolution!
Previous Pook Index Next
Deep Dish Congrats on pointing out the Dracula metaphor. There was a Native American myth of women who had teethed vaginas in such the male does not exit the same as he entered. The Dracula metaphor is found in almost all mythologies in the world.
Here is a passage from the Book of Proverbs. This 'book' is intended to be advice for YOUNG MEN. What does it speak of? Why, the same questions that are on this thread. It emphasis heavily that WISDOM is more important than any silver. It advises that one avoids these women and gives a beautiful description of the wife a young man should aim for.
QUOTE:
7:6. For I looked out of the window of my house through the lattice,
7:7. And I see little ones, I behold a foolish young man,
7:8. Who passeth through the street by the corner, and goeth nigh the way of her house,
7:9. In the dark when it grows late, in the darkness and obscurity of the night.
7:10. And behold a woman meeteth him in harlot’s attire, prepared to deceive souls: talkative and wandering,
7:11. Not bearing to be quiet, not able to abide still at home,
7:12. Now abroad, now in the streets, now lying in wait near the corners.
Already we see the ANCIENT description of women being BORED and very decieving.
QUOTE:
7:13. And catching the young man, she kisseth him, and with an impudent face, flattereth, saying:
7:14. I vowed victims for prosperity, this day I have paid my vows.
7:15. Therefore I am come out to meet thee, desirous to see thee, and I have found thee.
7:16. I have woven my bed with cords, I have covered it with painted tapestry, brought from Egypt.
7:17. I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.
7:18. Come, let us be inebriated with the breasts, and let us enjoy the desired embraces, till the day appear.
7:19. For my husband is not at home, he is gone a very long journey.
The husband is gone! The woman is married! She is not single and literally devouring the young foolish male.
QUOTE:
7:20. He took with him a bag of money: he will return home the day of the full moon.
7:21. She entangled him with many words, and drew him away with the flattery of her lips.
7:22. Immediately he followeth her as an ox led to the slaughter and as a lamb playing the wanton, and not knowing that he is drawn like a fool to bonds,
7:23. Till the arrow pierce his liver: as if a bird should make haste to the snare, and knoweth not that his life is in danger.
His life is in danger! Why is this ancient tome of wisdom saying such a thing?
"It is speaking of spiritual life, of his soul."
Yes but no! Just look around for validation. I see a fleet of young men, obviously gone the path that above foolish male did, and have their lives sucked from them. They lose their ambition. They just sit about, drowning in sensuality. They have become merely boy-toys. There is no Man in them.
QUOTE:
7:24. Now, therefore, my son, hear me, and attend to the words of my mouth.
7:25. Let not thy mind be drawn away in her ways: neither be thou deceived with her paths.
7:26. For she hath cast down many wounded, and the strongest have been slain by her.
7:27. Her house is the way to hell, reaching even to the inner chambers of death.
This is quite a condemning piece on these type of women. But the advice is sound.
If the foolish young man could speak, he would say, "Look at me! Look at me! I have sexed a married woman! Wow, that means I am really special! I have such sKilZ! I am SO AWESOME that I am bedding MARRIED WOMEN!"
The foolish youth is filled with vanity. He does not see that the woman is merely using and discarding him. It is like the guy who thinks the girl he is dating 'really really likes him'. In truth, she is just bored on Saturday night and going out is better than being at home.
All this talk of 'sexual revolution', of female 'independence' is a load of BS. As we can see, women have always acted this way. If there has been any 'sexual revolution', it has been in the decreased IGNORANCE of sexuality. There are less and less men and ladies as time goes by.
Rather than looking at things in a 'bad girl' or 'good girl' frame, it might be more helpful to look at it in a 'GIVING' or 'NONGIVING' frame.
For example, the 'NONGIVING' girl only sees you as a prop, as a boytoy, as an ATM card. This type of girl is all about HER, of what SHE can get for HERSELF. As a mother, she sees her children as merely agents to give her 'motherly feelings'. She doesn't truly GIVE her life for them or for the husband.
The GIVING girl tends to be the sweet one. She sees children not as a bangle to give her more status to this world or 'motherly feelings', but as someone to sacrifice and invest her life within. She even has that attitude towards you. She is the ideal wife and mother.
Rather than 'good' or 'bad' girl, I think the 'giving' and 'nongiving' frame is more illuminating.
bp1947 I really liked your post:
QUOTE: "A man can't commit to a set of female genitals, only to a whole woman who knows how to act like a woman and how to make her man feel like a man."
Exactly! Sexuality has been so perverted to think anything with the genitals. It involves the entire body...mind... and soul.
QUOTE: "Women want their man to make them feel like a woman, well it works both ways. Most women nowadays offer little more than regular sex, and when sex is so easily offered why should any of us guys bother to commit?"
I keep reading newstories (a trend) of young men shrugging off marriage, like Atlas shrugging off the world. The distinction is excellent. Rather than seeing women as just female genitals with their breasts, butt, etc. being merely genital ornamentation, men do want to marry only REAL women.
But with EVERY woman I come across, they ALL say, "I understand men" (you won't find a male who will say such a thing about women with any real confidence). They think they know how to CONTROL men, how to make 'men happy'. But they are SO VAIN and SO WRONG it is laughable.
All we 'learn' on sexuality nowadays are stale evolution theories, bogus psychologies, and bumper sticker political statements. There is no real knowledge on sexuality these days. There is no emphasis on girls to become ladies or boys to become men.
It's time for the world to have a TRUE Sexual Revolution!
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Thursday, August 12, 2004
Pook #43 - Feminism Put On Trial!
“All rise!”
sosuave.com enters the courtroom with extravagant robes. Like an old man, he walks slowly to the judge’s chair and sits. Everyone else sits after him.
sosuave.com puts on his glasses and says softly, “What is the matter?” The officer quickly walked over to sosuave.com and handed him the papers. Squinting through his glasses, he examined the papers.
“Who represents the Defense?”
A feminist stands. (Note: she is fat and ugly with a poisonous personality as most feminists are.)
“You represent All Women?”
“I do.”
Sosuave.com reads from the sheet. “You are accused of being Machiavellian rather than wise, calculating rather than smart, mimicking rather than confidant, full of gestures rather than full of actions, a highwayman who changes personalities and clothes to steal Man’s egos, a mind-shaper who possesses no identity, no virtues, no morals, no truths, and is ultimately a barbaric petty child-like species who transform all these vices into virtues under the hypnotic state called ‘Love’.”
He looked up. “How do you plead?”
“Innocent.”
“Now let us hear the argument. The representative of the Men may begin.”
Pook jumped from his seat. “Thank you, Your Honor. Many men are afflicted with the disease known as Nice Guyius Patheticus. Now, the symptoms of such disease are awful. The afflicted male will sacrifice dead plants as tokens of affection, write bad poetry, will speak in a language of banquets, and act like a fool in every and all ways.”
“Objection!”
“Yeah, you would object.”
The feminist snorted, “The matter is about women, not about men.”
“No,” sosuave.com answered. “Women effect men's behavior. Let us hear the argument.”
Pook smiled. “I call my first witness, the man with alligator skin when it comes to women, ANTI-DUMP!”
Anti-Dump walks in and stands in the front. The officer rushes by and holds up a rather thick book. “Place your hand on the DJ Bible.” He did so. “Do you swear, above all, to be a Man, to speak the truth of everything woman, to live with no apology, to know what you want and how to get it, and live to the fullest so through Don Juan?”
“I do.”
Pook paced back and forth. "Now, Anti-Dump, what would you suggest now to guys?"
"That men should stop trying to figure out if women or any woman likes them. Men are NOT women. Take off the dress guys.
It is WOMEN that wonder if a guy likes them before anything happens. Men have somehow picked up this bad habit from women."
"Go on."
"The thought of whether she likes you should never cross your mind. It is not important BEFORE you ask for the number. The important thing is you WANTING her. Always ask yourself "Do I want this one?". And the answer should be 'Wow. Boy do I!' That is all you need to know. Real men TAKE what they want."
Pook turned toward the jury, which had one of each twelve members plucked from the last twelve centuries to have a true verdict of History. "As Anti-Dump is saying, men are beginnning to think like women. Obviously, feminism has made a great change. Your witness."
The feminist approached Anti-Dump with caution. "Why are such an male-guided hard-nosed pig!?"
"But that's why you love me!"
Disgusted, she said, "No more questions."
As Anti-Dump left the stand, Pook set up charts. "Members of the jury! In every age, no man would be afraid of a girl. Certainly, he would not look at a woman as one looks at a trialing oddessey."
Pook turned toward the jury. "No, I have not gone beserk. I only agree with the D.C. sniper with ONE thing he said:
"Oprah Winfrey will cause the downfall of Mankind.
"Hence, it remains for us to acknoledge the weeds of Babylon emerging around this garden of men. Young people are caught up in imitations they do not know, do not wish to understand, but vainly beat their chest proclaiming how 'free' they now are without realizing that they are entering a prison that took prophets, the blood of martyrs, crusades on the battlefield, for us to emerge. A flight of vultures, of feminist harpies are circling overhead to pick at Man as vultures picked at Prometheus. These feminists (both the female and male variety) believe that they are highly progressive and well advanced. Yet, they are centuries behind the times.
"Feminism came without warning... and conquered men. It has created a generation of neurotic males. A male of this time may be one of them.
-Do you believe it is wrong to judge a woman by how she looks?
-Do you believe it is wrong to advance on a woman, sexually, with no verbal consent?
-Do you believe women have been 'discriminated' because of their gender, that males intentionally put women down?
-Do you believe that in sex, it is wrong to even consider to 'have your way with her' and become and be the sensuous animal you've always dreamed?
-Do you believe women desire, as priority, respect?
"If you believe in any of these things, even just a little, you have been affected by Modern Feminism. It is the virus that creates the effects known as Nice Guyius Patheticus!
"Women are judged on looks because YOU are judged on your looks (and women are much harsher about it!). Feminists think a magazine picture 'tyrannizes' young women. 'Forget my body, what about my mind?' they say. But did you ever hear a woman say to the Nice Guy, 'Your mind is great but I love your body!'? And every male is witness to the fact that women run towards testosteronized males, i.e. jerks.
"Why do men fail with women? It is because they respect them. This ‘great respect’ men find in women is nothing more than a lack of self respect, a lack of confidence. Woman’s reflectory nature must have something to reflect. If there is no confidence, there is no man. If there is no man, there can be no real male and, thus, any love.
"A recent Time magazine cover blared," Pook pointed to it, "that men and women are biologically different. Time treated this as a great discovery. But didn't we all know this when we turned age three or four? Feminism cannot see any biological differences between the sexes from the neck up."
The feminist interrupted. "Is there a point to all this?"
"Members of the jury, notice her tidy suit. Men change their clothes to match their lifestyles/attitudes. Women change their lifestyles/attitudes to match their clothes. Put her in a hula dress and she will start hula dancing!"
Before she could object, Pook added,
"Anyone who has thought about women will find little to value in them. The increase of thought about them; the increase of negativity is subscribed to them. The root of Nice Guyism is thinking too much about them. The more action you engage in, the more likely you are to get the hot chicks."
Sosuave.com hammered the gavel and let the feminist call her witness. It was an average normal woman. The feminist's witness placed her hand on the 'Feminist Mystique' book, whose true name is actually the Feminist Mistake. When she was done, Pook asked her some questions:
"Many men ask, 'What is the purpose of feminism?' After all, women have their votes, their careers, and their business-suits. Normal movements shut down once achieving their goals. Thus, feminism is not a normal movement.
"Now, let us question the women.
The woman, representing all women, was in the stand. Pook walks around her slowly, tapping on the bright light overhead.
“Why did you become a feminist?”
“Because… I was everything else. I was a daughter. Then, I became a woman. After that, I became a girlfriend. Then, I became a wife and mother. I had been everything. I was bored. Being a feminist was IT. There is nothing higher!”
Pook makes his voice louder. “SO YOU ADMIT THE TRUTH!”
“I do! I do! I confess!”
“NOW we see the picture. Woman sees herself in relation to society. Women are in a never ending war between mind and body. The body says, “YES!” while the mind, ever remembering the status of reputation, says ‘NO!’ Oh, if there only was a something that could FREE women of this state!”
“Yes…”
“Something that could make *****s respectable…”
“Yes!”
“And sluts sublime…”
“Oh yes!"
“To turn the abandonment of motherhood into ‘fulfilling a woman’s potential!”
“Yes! Yes! Yes!"
“To make nagging infinite, to let fat girls feel free to get fatter, and to give ugly girls a societal role!”
“OHHHH YESSSSS!” She falls unconscious.
“That is the purpose of feminism: to let women do whatever they want with an air of morality, to turn feminine immorality into virtue. Thus, the problem of feminism is not men but women.
"The truth: Feminism is not declaring war on masculinity but on femininity! Feminism is a political Tower of Babylon to escape the truth of Human Nature.
"I'm in America. And I LOVE foreign chicks. They are just so feminine. Here, the chicks act masculine and get fat. They find it shameful to place their time and talents into their family and children (whereas, it should be their greatest joy).
"I think it is great honor, joy, privledge, and pleasure to be a Man. Women can trump us as they can be a Mother of Men. There is much glory in masculinity and femininity. But feminists are AGAINST both.
Feminists Are Against Sexuality
"They attack masculinity and femininity as the former being the cause of oppressing, and the latter as the effect of the oppressed! Feminists desire a dull gray androgenous world without the sparkling lightning and glow that sexuality brings. The result is androgeny everywhere with both genders putting their priority on sex (here, there, anywhere, all positions, with all certain arrangements of threesomes, foursomes, orgies, etc.) The reason WHY is because sex, something no law or political philosophy can touch, is the only thing that makes women feel like women and men feel like men. Everything else that revolved around it (the old style dating, courtship, of suitors, of gentlemen, of class, of charm) has been politicized out of existance."
Pook called forth a band of men.
"Oh gentlemen! What is left for men to do that is male?"
"Gadgets."
"Sex with women."
"Bodybuilding."
"Sex with women."
"Hunting."
"Sex with women."
"Video games."
"Sex with women."
"Beer."
"Sex with women."
"Maxim."
"What answers are these! Where there was once the concept of Man as warrior, Man as philosopher, Man as many things, Manhood has been savagely attacked and brought down by the earthly beast who glitters with political maxims and whose crown is academic 'scholarship' that is supposed to 'prove' its glitter. In other words, the concept that masculinity and barbarism are one of the same is their new ruling scepter. As long as people belive in this idea, they will sit on that throne. This ties in to the belief that women have always been poor victims of masculinity, enslaved by the evil of 'Manhood'.
"I am pro-sex! Not in the way of libertines acting out beastial episodes, but in the manner of sexuality. Some people here have said, 'Pook! Why do you bring in things like literature and 'historic men' into this site? What do these have to do with anything?' They have everything to do with this site, for the majority of us are learning to embrace our sexuality, of both men and women. You can see sexuality as the key to the genius of Michelangelo's David and the dazzling energy and insight of Shakespeare. You can see the matter of sexuality bring up the great men onto the historical stage. You can find sexuality as being the core to great art and a key to genius. (But with sexuality removed, no wonder the great writings, art, and personalities of our Time are non-existant. Now, they are said to exist because of the politics behind them. But there is nothing 'great' or time defying in politics so they will not last).
"I am not exagerrating. Look at college campuses. They are full of girls. Boys are failing more and more in school. Less and less men are marrying because they are on strike against the current climate. In sexuality, Atlas is shrugging.
"This website should not exist. We, men, should not have to inquire on mating practices (for what is more natural than that!?)
Sosuave.com hit the gavel. "Get to the point, Pook!"
"It is proven that modern feminism has made men into apologizing neurotics. It has caused hell in the romantic union of the sexes. The virtue of feminism is to backstab men. So brute a part that feminism capitally plays, that no man will be given any due achievement.
"But feminism has done its worst damage outside the romantic realm. The slow cold rot of feminism has destroyed one male virtue after another until women cry out, 'Where have the men gone?'"
Pook pointed to the statistics showing females dominating universities and increasing their numbers. "Why is this? Because education has now become the process of de-genderization. Before, education was to turn a boy into a man. Mathematics, philosophy, literature, and so on were all to be used as tools or guides for Men against their fight of Nature and Time. These gentlemen had a style and class about them. They are extinct today."
The feminist started to complain again. So Pook addressed the point.
"She says that 'society has always been toward patriarchy'. In other words, men have been suppressing women down through the generations with their institutions and hierarchies. In order for women to free themselves, they must have political power.
"Thus, feminism is the poisoned fruit of Rousseau and classical teaching. Classical teaching, the echo of Romanism, holds that society is artificial. Society is a machine to be tampered and tweaked by the emperor. To these people, law creates society rather than society creating law. Rather than hold that society being the symphony of the rights of Man, this classical teaching puts society to be moved and sculpted by the law."
Pook takes out a scroll and reads:
"Rousseau is made to say,
Whoever ventures to undertake the founding of a nation should feel himself capable of changing human nature, so to speak; of transforming each individual, who by himself is a perfect and separate whole, into a part of a greater whole, from which that individual somehow receives his life and his being; of changing the physical constitution of man in order to strengthen it, etc., etc ... If it be true that a great prince is a rarity, what, then, is to be said of a great law- giver? The first has only to follow the model that the other constructs. The latter is the artificer who invents the machine; the former is only the operator who turns it on and runs it.
So what are people in all this? Why, they are merely the blocks and parts of the machine. No wonder feminists throw themselves at the legislative palace!
Let me call another witness: Ms. Wyldfire.
Wyldfire approached the stand. She put her hand on the DJ Bible as the officer said, "Do you swear, above all, to be a Man, to speak the truth of everything woman, to live with no apology, to know what you want and how to get it, and live to the fullest so through Don Juan?”
"I do."
Pook started to ask her about feminism until Wyldfire broke out ranting against it.
"There isn't and never has been any patriarchy....that's a totally bogus concept. True, things were oppressive for women back in the day, but they were also oppressive for men. While women had less choices, men bore the lion's share of the responsibility. The right to vote came at a price...the price of potentially laying down your life to protect this country.
"That was the same price for owning land. There was not all the high tech equipment we have today to help do the majority of the work...it was much harder work and men did almost all of it, and all of the most dangerous. In fairness to women, they didn't have the vacuum cleaners, electric washing machines or microwave ovens, so they worked hard. They were needed at home to keep the home running and the family cared for. It was a full time job. These gender roles were required for survival. It was never some evil plot to hold women down...it was a necessity."
"Your witness."
The feminist roared: "Explain the 'wage gap' then!"
"It's a farce. Feminists claim that women are only paid 74 cents for every dollar a man makes. This angers a lot of women. The figures themselves are correct, but they are not presented truthfully. The numbers represent men and women as a whole, NOT comparing a man and a woman in the same company with the same seniority, same experience and education. Men as a whole will always make more than women as a whole because there are stay at home Moms, wives who only work part time, and women who take time off to have babies. Men also work more overtime and more of the dangerous and higher paying jobs. It is against the law to pay a woman less than a man for the same job, and qualifications...so anyone who believes this feminist lie is not very bright."
"And the glass ceiling?"
"Yes, that proverbial "glass ceiling"! Feminists whine that there aren't enough women in corporate management. HELLO??? Women have only been in the work force with more women working than not for the last 20 years or so. Most corporate managers have put that much time in with the company before getting one of those jobs unless he's a family member of the owner. It's about paying dues and earning those positions, and women will get there as soon as they pay those same dues and invest that same time."
The feminist, defeated, said, "No more questions," and Wyldfire returned to her world.
Now came the time for closing arguments.
The jury of the twelve centuries listened intentively. The feminist ranted and raved. When she was done, Pook gave a calm and logical presentation, outlining what was already discussed. Feminism is essentially about DESEXUALIZATION. This is where Nice Guys, AFCs, come from. This is why feminists are so bitter. But since sexuality is no longer embraced, male-female harmonics becomes disrupted. Androgenous people sport in sex since that is the only way to make them feel male/female. Because of this desexualization, art, leadership, and education suffer.
Pook brought out another woman, one he met in flesh and blood. She was in her forties. She said, "I don't believe in feminism. Women are the dominant sex. Men are so naive about relationships and sexuality. Men may be physically dominant, but women are emotionally dominant. Who controls the finances in most homes? It is the woman. Look in the banks and you will find them filled with women. I could be a woman in any age. But I would never wish to be a man in this age, where manhood has been condemned.
"Members of the jury... Consider the choice you are making:
The Choice Before Us
"Of Man or Woman; this the choice of Humanity. Shall civilization be a Mankind who seeks to go forever forward and gain independence of spirit from the gross natural calamities that compose the flesh? Or shall civilization sigh into a Womankind that retreats back to infancy to a warm milk-flowing sleep? For the all, this raised empires and rots them within. For the one, this attracts respect or dishonor to make the life a series of avalanching regrets. For who would walk the path of a man and bear the thorns, traps, and trolls that nature’s filled? Of science! Of philosophy! Of art! For these are the stones of civilization! But how pure and blissful is the sleep that femininity dreams in! The dance and music of love’s eternity! The wine, the song, the crest of love itself! The choice not taken is always the choice yearned for. But are there not two sexes? Has not Nature divided Humanity into two distinct parts? Then let us choose both. Let women be women and let men be men. Let one hold up the scepter of Reaction and the rest embrace the Man, that infinite name of Action!"
The jury exited and made their decision. When they returned, Renaissance, Dark Ages, Middle Ages, Industrial Age, Pioneer Age, and so on took their seats. It was the Twentieth Century that announced the verdict:
"Guilty."
Sosuave.com announced the punishment: "Those who take feminism seriously will be condemned to bitterness, ugliness, and joylessness. Any males who listen will be condemned to loneliness, stuffed with Nice Guyius Patheticus."
There IS a war against men, gentlemen. And Feminism is leading the charge. Guilt filled men sound like this:
QUOTE: "One of the reasons I started to care about radical feminism as much as I did was because it seemed to resolve for me a certain dilemma about myself in relation to other men. I had always felt irremediably different - even when no one else noticed, I knew - I knew I wasn't really one of them. When I first began to come in contact with the ideas of radical feminism, those ideas seemed to put to rest that cer- tain trouble. Radical feminism helped me imagine a gender-just future, a notion of a possibility that men need not be brutish and loutish, that women need not be cutesy and coy. It was a vision that energized me. It helped me view the whole male-supremacist structure of gender as a social construction, not as a final judgment on our natures - and not as a final judgment on mine.
Radical feminism helped me honor in myself the differences that I felt between myself and other men; radical feminism helped me know my connections to the lives of women, with whom I had not imagined I would ever find a model for who I could be. And it's also true - and not easy to admit - that radical feminism helped provide me with a form in which to express my anger at other men - an anger that in men can run very deep, as many of us know."
He is different from most guys because he refuses to be male.
But he goes on:
QUOTE: "I think that for many men who have become anti-sexists over the past several years, their anti-sexism has had meaning to them for similar reasons. In various ways, feminism has blown like a gust of fresh air through a lifetime spent agonizing and anguishing about the place of other men in our lives. For a few of us, feminism has helped us breathe a bit easier."
Not so! By letting fat women get fatter, they choke on themselves! I see a couple of them riding those 'carts' in grocery stores all the time!
QUOTE: "But it would be a mistake to suggest that a man's antisexism puts to rest his ambivalence toward other men. I think that an antisexist consciousness actually makes the conflict more acute. Such a man perceives even more clearly the behaviors and attitudes in other men that he rejects, and he understands more about what those behaviors and attitudes mean, and in a sense they are the be- haviours and attitudes in himself that he wants to be rid of, and somehow other men can remind him of the parts of himself that have not changed very much at all, and whereas he briefly felt good about being different from other men, a part of him no longer feels quite different enough.
So his anger at other men intensifies, as a means of keeping clear to himself that he's an exception. Meanwhile he misses the company of other men - their ease, their companionship, the good feelings he remembers having had in their presence.
For many men, the issue of other men is a classic conflict of approach and avoidance. For a man whose life increasingly has to do with antisexism, the conflict cuts to the bone. He struggles with what it means to be a man - and whether he feels ashamed or proud."
And this guy feels ashamed. He actually wrote a book called "Refusal to be a Man" which is what I'm quoting.
So Which is it, good reader? You must now make the choice. It all comes down to:
Sosuave's Be a Man or Oprah's Be a Man?
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sosuave.com enters the courtroom with extravagant robes. Like an old man, he walks slowly to the judge’s chair and sits. Everyone else sits after him.
sosuave.com puts on his glasses and says softly, “What is the matter?” The officer quickly walked over to sosuave.com and handed him the papers. Squinting through his glasses, he examined the papers.
“Who represents the Defense?”
A feminist stands. (Note: she is fat and ugly with a poisonous personality as most feminists are.)
“You represent All Women?”
“I do.”
Sosuave.com reads from the sheet. “You are accused of being Machiavellian rather than wise, calculating rather than smart, mimicking rather than confidant, full of gestures rather than full of actions, a highwayman who changes personalities and clothes to steal Man’s egos, a mind-shaper who possesses no identity, no virtues, no morals, no truths, and is ultimately a barbaric petty child-like species who transform all these vices into virtues under the hypnotic state called ‘Love’.”
He looked up. “How do you plead?”
“Innocent.”
“Now let us hear the argument. The representative of the Men may begin.”
Pook jumped from his seat. “Thank you, Your Honor. Many men are afflicted with the disease known as Nice Guyius Patheticus. Now, the symptoms of such disease are awful. The afflicted male will sacrifice dead plants as tokens of affection, write bad poetry, will speak in a language of banquets, and act like a fool in every and all ways.”
“Objection!”
“Yeah, you would object.”
The feminist snorted, “The matter is about women, not about men.”
“No,” sosuave.com answered. “Women effect men's behavior. Let us hear the argument.”
Pook smiled. “I call my first witness, the man with alligator skin when it comes to women, ANTI-DUMP!”
Anti-Dump walks in and stands in the front. The officer rushes by and holds up a rather thick book. “Place your hand on the DJ Bible.” He did so. “Do you swear, above all, to be a Man, to speak the truth of everything woman, to live with no apology, to know what you want and how to get it, and live to the fullest so through Don Juan?”
“I do.”
Pook paced back and forth. "Now, Anti-Dump, what would you suggest now to guys?"
"That men should stop trying to figure out if women or any woman likes them. Men are NOT women. Take off the dress guys.
It is WOMEN that wonder if a guy likes them before anything happens. Men have somehow picked up this bad habit from women."
"Go on."
"The thought of whether she likes you should never cross your mind. It is not important BEFORE you ask for the number. The important thing is you WANTING her. Always ask yourself "Do I want this one?". And the answer should be 'Wow. Boy do I!' That is all you need to know. Real men TAKE what they want."
Pook turned toward the jury, which had one of each twelve members plucked from the last twelve centuries to have a true verdict of History. "As Anti-Dump is saying, men are beginnning to think like women. Obviously, feminism has made a great change. Your witness."
The feminist approached Anti-Dump with caution. "Why are such an male-guided hard-nosed pig!?"
"But that's why you love me!"
Disgusted, she said, "No more questions."
As Anti-Dump left the stand, Pook set up charts. "Members of the jury! In every age, no man would be afraid of a girl. Certainly, he would not look at a woman as one looks at a trialing oddessey."
Pook turned toward the jury. "No, I have not gone beserk. I only agree with the D.C. sniper with ONE thing he said:
"Oprah Winfrey will cause the downfall of Mankind.
"Hence, it remains for us to acknoledge the weeds of Babylon emerging around this garden of men. Young people are caught up in imitations they do not know, do not wish to understand, but vainly beat their chest proclaiming how 'free' they now are without realizing that they are entering a prison that took prophets, the blood of martyrs, crusades on the battlefield, for us to emerge. A flight of vultures, of feminist harpies are circling overhead to pick at Man as vultures picked at Prometheus. These feminists (both the female and male variety) believe that they are highly progressive and well advanced. Yet, they are centuries behind the times.
"Feminism came without warning... and conquered men. It has created a generation of neurotic males. A male of this time may be one of them.
-Do you believe it is wrong to judge a woman by how she looks?
-Do you believe it is wrong to advance on a woman, sexually, with no verbal consent?
-Do you believe women have been 'discriminated' because of their gender, that males intentionally put women down?
-Do you believe that in sex, it is wrong to even consider to 'have your way with her' and become and be the sensuous animal you've always dreamed?
-Do you believe women desire, as priority, respect?
"If you believe in any of these things, even just a little, you have been affected by Modern Feminism. It is the virus that creates the effects known as Nice Guyius Patheticus!
"Women are judged on looks because YOU are judged on your looks (and women are much harsher about it!). Feminists think a magazine picture 'tyrannizes' young women. 'Forget my body, what about my mind?' they say. But did you ever hear a woman say to the Nice Guy, 'Your mind is great but I love your body!'? And every male is witness to the fact that women run towards testosteronized males, i.e. jerks.
"Why do men fail with women? It is because they respect them. This ‘great respect’ men find in women is nothing more than a lack of self respect, a lack of confidence. Woman’s reflectory nature must have something to reflect. If there is no confidence, there is no man. If there is no man, there can be no real male and, thus, any love.
"A recent Time magazine cover blared," Pook pointed to it, "that men and women are biologically different. Time treated this as a great discovery. But didn't we all know this when we turned age three or four? Feminism cannot see any biological differences between the sexes from the neck up."
The feminist interrupted. "Is there a point to all this?"
"Members of the jury, notice her tidy suit. Men change their clothes to match their lifestyles/attitudes. Women change their lifestyles/attitudes to match their clothes. Put her in a hula dress and she will start hula dancing!"
Before she could object, Pook added,
"Anyone who has thought about women will find little to value in them. The increase of thought about them; the increase of negativity is subscribed to them. The root of Nice Guyism is thinking too much about them. The more action you engage in, the more likely you are to get the hot chicks."
Sosuave.com hammered the gavel and let the feminist call her witness. It was an average normal woman. The feminist's witness placed her hand on the 'Feminist Mystique' book, whose true name is actually the Feminist Mistake. When she was done, Pook asked her some questions:
"Many men ask, 'What is the purpose of feminism?' After all, women have their votes, their careers, and their business-suits. Normal movements shut down once achieving their goals. Thus, feminism is not a normal movement.
"Now, let us question the women.
The woman, representing all women, was in the stand. Pook walks around her slowly, tapping on the bright light overhead.
“Why did you become a feminist?”
“Because… I was everything else. I was a daughter. Then, I became a woman. After that, I became a girlfriend. Then, I became a wife and mother. I had been everything. I was bored. Being a feminist was IT. There is nothing higher!”
Pook makes his voice louder. “SO YOU ADMIT THE TRUTH!”
“I do! I do! I confess!”
“NOW we see the picture. Woman sees herself in relation to society. Women are in a never ending war between mind and body. The body says, “YES!” while the mind, ever remembering the status of reputation, says ‘NO!’ Oh, if there only was a something that could FREE women of this state!”
“Yes…”
“Something that could make *****s respectable…”
“Yes!”
“And sluts sublime…”
“Oh yes!"
“To turn the abandonment of motherhood into ‘fulfilling a woman’s potential!”
“Yes! Yes! Yes!"
“To make nagging infinite, to let fat girls feel free to get fatter, and to give ugly girls a societal role!”
“OHHHH YESSSSS!” She falls unconscious.
“That is the purpose of feminism: to let women do whatever they want with an air of morality, to turn feminine immorality into virtue. Thus, the problem of feminism is not men but women.
"The truth: Feminism is not declaring war on masculinity but on femininity! Feminism is a political Tower of Babylon to escape the truth of Human Nature.
"I'm in America. And I LOVE foreign chicks. They are just so feminine. Here, the chicks act masculine and get fat. They find it shameful to place their time and talents into their family and children (whereas, it should be their greatest joy).
"I think it is great honor, joy, privledge, and pleasure to be a Man. Women can trump us as they can be a Mother of Men. There is much glory in masculinity and femininity. But feminists are AGAINST both.
Feminists Are Against Sexuality
"They attack masculinity and femininity as the former being the cause of oppressing, and the latter as the effect of the oppressed! Feminists desire a dull gray androgenous world without the sparkling lightning and glow that sexuality brings. The result is androgeny everywhere with both genders putting their priority on sex (here, there, anywhere, all positions, with all certain arrangements of threesomes, foursomes, orgies, etc.) The reason WHY is because sex, something no law or political philosophy can touch, is the only thing that makes women feel like women and men feel like men. Everything else that revolved around it (the old style dating, courtship, of suitors, of gentlemen, of class, of charm) has been politicized out of existance."
Pook called forth a band of men.
"Oh gentlemen! What is left for men to do that is male?"
"Gadgets."
"Sex with women."
"Bodybuilding."
"Sex with women."
"Hunting."
"Sex with women."
"Video games."
"Sex with women."
"Beer."
"Sex with women."
"Maxim."
"What answers are these! Where there was once the concept of Man as warrior, Man as philosopher, Man as many things, Manhood has been savagely attacked and brought down by the earthly beast who glitters with political maxims and whose crown is academic 'scholarship' that is supposed to 'prove' its glitter. In other words, the concept that masculinity and barbarism are one of the same is their new ruling scepter. As long as people belive in this idea, they will sit on that throne. This ties in to the belief that women have always been poor victims of masculinity, enslaved by the evil of 'Manhood'.
"I am pro-sex! Not in the way of libertines acting out beastial episodes, but in the manner of sexuality. Some people here have said, 'Pook! Why do you bring in things like literature and 'historic men' into this site? What do these have to do with anything?' They have everything to do with this site, for the majority of us are learning to embrace our sexuality, of both men and women. You can see sexuality as the key to the genius of Michelangelo's David and the dazzling energy and insight of Shakespeare. You can see the matter of sexuality bring up the great men onto the historical stage. You can find sexuality as being the core to great art and a key to genius. (But with sexuality removed, no wonder the great writings, art, and personalities of our Time are non-existant. Now, they are said to exist because of the politics behind them. But there is nothing 'great' or time defying in politics so they will not last).
"I am not exagerrating. Look at college campuses. They are full of girls. Boys are failing more and more in school. Less and less men are marrying because they are on strike against the current climate. In sexuality, Atlas is shrugging.
"This website should not exist. We, men, should not have to inquire on mating practices (for what is more natural than that!?)
Sosuave.com hit the gavel. "Get to the point, Pook!"
"It is proven that modern feminism has made men into apologizing neurotics. It has caused hell in the romantic union of the sexes. The virtue of feminism is to backstab men. So brute a part that feminism capitally plays, that no man will be given any due achievement.
"But feminism has done its worst damage outside the romantic realm. The slow cold rot of feminism has destroyed one male virtue after another until women cry out, 'Where have the men gone?'"
Pook pointed to the statistics showing females dominating universities and increasing their numbers. "Why is this? Because education has now become the process of de-genderization. Before, education was to turn a boy into a man. Mathematics, philosophy, literature, and so on were all to be used as tools or guides for Men against their fight of Nature and Time. These gentlemen had a style and class about them. They are extinct today."
The feminist started to complain again. So Pook addressed the point.
"She says that 'society has always been toward patriarchy'. In other words, men have been suppressing women down through the generations with their institutions and hierarchies. In order for women to free themselves, they must have political power.
"Thus, feminism is the poisoned fruit of Rousseau and classical teaching. Classical teaching, the echo of Romanism, holds that society is artificial. Society is a machine to be tampered and tweaked by the emperor. To these people, law creates society rather than society creating law. Rather than hold that society being the symphony of the rights of Man, this classical teaching puts society to be moved and sculpted by the law."
Pook takes out a scroll and reads:
"Rousseau is made to say,
Whoever ventures to undertake the founding of a nation should feel himself capable of changing human nature, so to speak; of transforming each individual, who by himself is a perfect and separate whole, into a part of a greater whole, from which that individual somehow receives his life and his being; of changing the physical constitution of man in order to strengthen it, etc., etc ... If it be true that a great prince is a rarity, what, then, is to be said of a great law- giver? The first has only to follow the model that the other constructs. The latter is the artificer who invents the machine; the former is only the operator who turns it on and runs it.
So what are people in all this? Why, they are merely the blocks and parts of the machine. No wonder feminists throw themselves at the legislative palace!
Let me call another witness: Ms. Wyldfire.
Wyldfire approached the stand. She put her hand on the DJ Bible as the officer said, "Do you swear, above all, to be a Man, to speak the truth of everything woman, to live with no apology, to know what you want and how to get it, and live to the fullest so through Don Juan?”
"I do."
Pook started to ask her about feminism until Wyldfire broke out ranting against it.
"There isn't and never has been any patriarchy....that's a totally bogus concept. True, things were oppressive for women back in the day, but they were also oppressive for men. While women had less choices, men bore the lion's share of the responsibility. The right to vote came at a price...the price of potentially laying down your life to protect this country.
"That was the same price for owning land. There was not all the high tech equipment we have today to help do the majority of the work...it was much harder work and men did almost all of it, and all of the most dangerous. In fairness to women, they didn't have the vacuum cleaners, electric washing machines or microwave ovens, so they worked hard. They were needed at home to keep the home running and the family cared for. It was a full time job. These gender roles were required for survival. It was never some evil plot to hold women down...it was a necessity."
"Your witness."
The feminist roared: "Explain the 'wage gap' then!"
"It's a farce. Feminists claim that women are only paid 74 cents for every dollar a man makes. This angers a lot of women. The figures themselves are correct, but they are not presented truthfully. The numbers represent men and women as a whole, NOT comparing a man and a woman in the same company with the same seniority, same experience and education. Men as a whole will always make more than women as a whole because there are stay at home Moms, wives who only work part time, and women who take time off to have babies. Men also work more overtime and more of the dangerous and higher paying jobs. It is against the law to pay a woman less than a man for the same job, and qualifications...so anyone who believes this feminist lie is not very bright."
"And the glass ceiling?"
"Yes, that proverbial "glass ceiling"! Feminists whine that there aren't enough women in corporate management. HELLO??? Women have only been in the work force with more women working than not for the last 20 years or so. Most corporate managers have put that much time in with the company before getting one of those jobs unless he's a family member of the owner. It's about paying dues and earning those positions, and women will get there as soon as they pay those same dues and invest that same time."
The feminist, defeated, said, "No more questions," and Wyldfire returned to her world.
Now came the time for closing arguments.
The jury of the twelve centuries listened intentively. The feminist ranted and raved. When she was done, Pook gave a calm and logical presentation, outlining what was already discussed. Feminism is essentially about DESEXUALIZATION. This is where Nice Guys, AFCs, come from. This is why feminists are so bitter. But since sexuality is no longer embraced, male-female harmonics becomes disrupted. Androgenous people sport in sex since that is the only way to make them feel male/female. Because of this desexualization, art, leadership, and education suffer.
Pook brought out another woman, one he met in flesh and blood. She was in her forties. She said, "I don't believe in feminism. Women are the dominant sex. Men are so naive about relationships and sexuality. Men may be physically dominant, but women are emotionally dominant. Who controls the finances in most homes? It is the woman. Look in the banks and you will find them filled with women. I could be a woman in any age. But I would never wish to be a man in this age, where manhood has been condemned.
"Members of the jury... Consider the choice you are making:
The Choice Before Us
"Of Man or Woman; this the choice of Humanity. Shall civilization be a Mankind who seeks to go forever forward and gain independence of spirit from the gross natural calamities that compose the flesh? Or shall civilization sigh into a Womankind that retreats back to infancy to a warm milk-flowing sleep? For the all, this raised empires and rots them within. For the one, this attracts respect or dishonor to make the life a series of avalanching regrets. For who would walk the path of a man and bear the thorns, traps, and trolls that nature’s filled? Of science! Of philosophy! Of art! For these are the stones of civilization! But how pure and blissful is the sleep that femininity dreams in! The dance and music of love’s eternity! The wine, the song, the crest of love itself! The choice not taken is always the choice yearned for. But are there not two sexes? Has not Nature divided Humanity into two distinct parts? Then let us choose both. Let women be women and let men be men. Let one hold up the scepter of Reaction and the rest embrace the Man, that infinite name of Action!"
The jury exited and made their decision. When they returned, Renaissance, Dark Ages, Middle Ages, Industrial Age, Pioneer Age, and so on took their seats. It was the Twentieth Century that announced the verdict:
"Guilty."
Sosuave.com announced the punishment: "Those who take feminism seriously will be condemned to bitterness, ugliness, and joylessness. Any males who listen will be condemned to loneliness, stuffed with Nice Guyius Patheticus."
There IS a war against men, gentlemen. And Feminism is leading the charge. Guilt filled men sound like this:
QUOTE: "One of the reasons I started to care about radical feminism as much as I did was because it seemed to resolve for me a certain dilemma about myself in relation to other men. I had always felt irremediably different - even when no one else noticed, I knew - I knew I wasn't really one of them. When I first began to come in contact with the ideas of radical feminism, those ideas seemed to put to rest that cer- tain trouble. Radical feminism helped me imagine a gender-just future, a notion of a possibility that men need not be brutish and loutish, that women need not be cutesy and coy. It was a vision that energized me. It helped me view the whole male-supremacist structure of gender as a social construction, not as a final judgment on our natures - and not as a final judgment on mine.
Radical feminism helped me honor in myself the differences that I felt between myself and other men; radical feminism helped me know my connections to the lives of women, with whom I had not imagined I would ever find a model for who I could be. And it's also true - and not easy to admit - that radical feminism helped provide me with a form in which to express my anger at other men - an anger that in men can run very deep, as many of us know."
He is different from most guys because he refuses to be male.
But he goes on:
QUOTE: "I think that for many men who have become anti-sexists over the past several years, their anti-sexism has had meaning to them for similar reasons. In various ways, feminism has blown like a gust of fresh air through a lifetime spent agonizing and anguishing about the place of other men in our lives. For a few of us, feminism has helped us breathe a bit easier."
Not so! By letting fat women get fatter, they choke on themselves! I see a couple of them riding those 'carts' in grocery stores all the time!
QUOTE: "But it would be a mistake to suggest that a man's antisexism puts to rest his ambivalence toward other men. I think that an antisexist consciousness actually makes the conflict more acute. Such a man perceives even more clearly the behaviors and attitudes in other men that he rejects, and he understands more about what those behaviors and attitudes mean, and in a sense they are the be- haviours and attitudes in himself that he wants to be rid of, and somehow other men can remind him of the parts of himself that have not changed very much at all, and whereas he briefly felt good about being different from other men, a part of him no longer feels quite different enough.
So his anger at other men intensifies, as a means of keeping clear to himself that he's an exception. Meanwhile he misses the company of other men - their ease, their companionship, the good feelings he remembers having had in their presence.
For many men, the issue of other men is a classic conflict of approach and avoidance. For a man whose life increasingly has to do with antisexism, the conflict cuts to the bone. He struggles with what it means to be a man - and whether he feels ashamed or proud."
And this guy feels ashamed. He actually wrote a book called "Refusal to be a Man" which is what I'm quoting.
So Which is it, good reader? You must now make the choice. It all comes down to:
Sosuave's Be a Man or Oprah's Be a Man?
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