Monday, May 10, 2004

Bonecrcker #132 - Finding and Approaching Women

You can’t ask a woman for anything because it gives her too many points. You need to use body language and only approach the ones that matter. And you can’t be direct about it.

The basic behavior goes like this. Go places where you are likely to meet women (either go where women go or go where women go to get picked up). Make eye contact with every woman that crosses your path. Most women will not meet your gaze. Some of them will. After holding their gaze for just a second or two more than is socially appropriate, look away (not down, away). She might look down and away too, which is OK. After a few seconds, try to catch her gaze again and see if she locks gazes with you. Smile and nod to her if she does. If you feel aggressive, wink. If she holds your gaze this second time for an extended period of time and/or starts clustering body language signals of interest (read the book, Body Language by R Don Steele), that is one of the 1% of random women that will have sex with you right now, if you approach her correctly. It’s extremely reliable.

Approaching correctly means that you come near her tangentially. You seem like you are actually doing something else. For example: You see one of these women in the mall. Don’t go right up to her. Go near her and pretend to shop or look at something interesting. You strike up a conversation by noticing something about her and commenting on it and then asking a question. For example: "That’s a very nice sweater you are wearing. What’s the story behind it? Blah, blah, blah." Understand that women are completely self-involved. So shut your yap and look like you are paying attention and listen for cues for other getting to know you type questions. Tell her almost nothing about yourself other than your name and give her every opportunity to tell you even the most inane blather about herself. She’ll think you are the most brilliant, interesting man on the planet. When you can’t take this anymore, interupt her with some version of, "I have to go, want to come with me?" Whoops, I have to go home now and cook dinner and feed my cat. Hey, you know I making this great rice dish called Arroz con Pollo. I learned how to make it from this sweet old lady while I was vacationing in Puerto Rico. Come have dinner with me. We’ll watch this video I’ve been meaning to see……The English Patient; I think it’s called (hehehe).

The point here is she has already decided she wants to come home with you to have sex. But she doesn’t know that you know that. And, she absolutely cannot face this fact without a convenient excuse that she is actually going over there for something else and the sex is just spontaneous. Make no mistake, once you get her home, she’s the one who will likely be the aggressor, or will need very little prompting. If you get any resistance at all, it’s time to cut and run because you screwed something up, probably misjudging if she was a one percenter. A lot of women will show casual interest. But it’s the one percenter that will show focussed, intense interest. They are practically drooling.

There really is no work involved in finding her, other than in going to those places you are likely to find her. Don’t stay; don’t waste your time with pointless crap while there. Whatever you do don’t pay a cover or anything (if you go for the band or something, that’s me time and you should ignore women). Just recon the place looking for one percenters. Leave and move on to the next place if you don’t immediately find a hit. Get in the habit of scoping out chicks all the time, but set aside a specific time each week where you zoom through several hot spots every week. Don’t stay and waste your time. Show up, look, and if nothing is there…..leave.

After the first few times, it’s easy. The first few times are hard because you screw things up and it’s hard to initiate things because you don’t really think things work this way. Instead, you think all women are judging you and rejecting you (and 99% of them are). Until you sleep with a few, you don’t know that 1% is there for easy taking. I say the same thing to all my guy friends. Try it out a little at a time. The easiest part is scoping these women out. Go places and try the eye contact bit. Don’t follow up on it. Just try it out and see for yourself what I am talking about. After you are comfortable doing this for a few weeks, try occasionally saying Hi to one of them. Nothing complicated. Just Hi. You’ll be shocked at the result and soon, you’ll be doing the rest.

And for God’s sake, don’t give the time of day or anything else, not the slightest bit of respect, not a shred of time or effort, to any woman who isn’t one of these. A woman who isn’t sexually interested in you should be totally beneath notice. No staring at her tits. No talking to her. She’s invisible. Women are sweet as pie when they are in acquisition mode (you being what they wish to acquire) but they are evil incarnate every time else. Only extremely high probability babes deserve even an ounce of your time. Everyone else is wasting it.

Screw em.

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Related:

Bonecrcker #41 – Finding the Small Pool of Interested Women