Y'know, [Harpie], you are the 5 best arguments for staying single I have ever run across.
You have that incurable female tunnel vision. SOME men get to " produce, create, and imagine", but for every one who does there are 19 who crawl into holes in the ground to mine out the coal that provides your electricity, or the ore that gets made into steel for that nice new car you want, or cut down the trees that go into the lumber to build that nice house in the 'burbs you want, or go to work on construction when it is blistering hot or freezing cold to build that nice environmentally conditioned office you work in.
Kathryn Hepburn was one of the greatest actresses of the 20th century, and unlike women today was smart enough to know that she couldn't "have it all." She knew that choices had prices and when she chose to "produce, create, and imagine!" she knew that she was chosing not to have a family.
I have no problem at all with women having careers. However, I am not willing to be item # 4 on a "to do" list - a disposable accessory which enables her to get to # 5, having kids.
The only woman I ever made the mistake of "oppressing" into living expense-free on my generosity was a trained chef. I had to apply my boot to her ass frequently to get her off said ass and out looking for a job where she could "produce, create, and imagine!" instead of watching Oprah. Being in the habit of doing the household laundry myself, I simply kept doing it after she moved in. I also had a housecleaning service which kept the house up, so the sum total of her tasks at keeping house were to buy groceries, which I split the costs with her, and cook. It took me at most 10 minutes to load the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen after a meal, no matter what a god-awful mess she made.
So, go ahead and have your "career", and keep turning up your nose at men who work as garage mechanics. And, when you are in your mid-40s and going home to a cat named Fluffy and lean cuisine in the microwave, maybe you will wake the fuck up to how thick you were in your late 20s.
"There was a struggle going on inside of me. I mean, he lost his job at the auto body shop when they went [bankrupt] and closed down. Then he couldn't find another one. But it was months and months, and I was trying to live on my welfare check and it just wasn't enough. Finally, I couldn't do it anymore [because] it was just too much pressure on me [even though] he is the love of my life. I told him he had to leave even though I knew it wasn't really his fault... I couldn't take it, so I made him leave." -- A woman interviewed by Kathryn Edin, reported in The American Prospect, January 3, 2000
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