Bonecrcker #118 - Women Who Marry Scumbags

With rare exceptions, a woman who marries a scumbag does it because she’s nuts. So even if the divorce is his fault, it means she is bad news. An example: I dated a woman a few times who had only been with one guy before. They had known each-other since they were kids. They fell in love in high school, then lived together while going to college (she supported him, actually). About a year after he graduated he started smoking crack cocaine with a (supposedly) dramatic change in his personality. They were Catholic and she did not want to divorce him. But one day he came home and dinner wasn’t ready so he picked up a hammer out of the toolbox and bashed her head in with it. She was in a coma for 3 days and filed for divorce afterward (no kids). 

Even though it sounds like she couldn’t be responsible for this having to do with her, I later find out WHY he had been doing crack. It turns out that both are 3rd generation members of the mafia. He primarily made his money selling drugs and started using. Note that this woman is a doctor now. This is a disturbing example because it illustrates two things. The first is that women from traditionally reputable situations (professionals etc.) can EASILY actually be from the criminal underclass. The other is that, almost without exception, a woman who has to bail on a marriage with a dangerous man will have serious skeletons in her closet that clearly demonstrate how her own character is responsible for her being with such a man (it ain’t no accident). Unfortunately, you often have to do quite a bit of digging to discover this and are usually deeply involved with her before you do. I think it is easier (and more reliable) to simply assume such things.

Children out of wedlock, divorces (particularly multiple divorces), children of mixed parentage (unless they are married and successful), ex-spouse in jail, ex-spouse is a criminal, violent, has ever used drugs of any type. These are all extremely reliable indicators that you don’t want to have your life entangled with this woman.

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Related:

Bonecrcker #5 – Women Choosing Losers

Bonecrcker #10 – Women Choosing Scum

Bonecrcker #36 – Just Say No To Divorced Women

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Radio Priest and the female mind (a transcript)

Woman: I am confused. The man I am with now is the best friend I ever had, but I think I should go back to the man I was with before, even though he used to abuse me badly.

Priest: But you really feel a lot for the man you're with now . . . so I think you should do what your heart tells you!

Woman: My heart tells me to go back to the man who abused me.

Priest: Then you should do what your mind tells you. -- Kevin Solway